y
Gover'ment says they've got to be wire. 'Owever, it's _your_ risk, not
mine. Well, since you ask me, I think you _'ad_ better wait.

_A Customer (carrying a large brown-and-white dog with lop ears and
soulful eyes)._ I've been kept waiting here two hours, and I think it's
high time--

_Assistant._ If you'll bring 'im along to the back shop, Mum, I _may_
have one left his size.

_A Lady with a lovely complexion and an unlovely griffon (to her
companion)._ So fussy and tiresome of the Government bringing in muzzles
again after all these years!

_Her Companion._ Oh, I don't _know_. We've had a mysterious dog running
about snapping in our district for days.

_The Lady with the complexion._ Ah, but _this_ poor darling _never_
snaps, and, besides, he hasn't been used to muzzles in Belgium. You
needn't _mention_ it, but I got a friend of mine to smuggle him over for
me--such a _dear_ boy, he'll do anything I ask him to.

_Assistant (after attempting to fit the soulful-eyed dog with a muzzle
and narrowly escaping being bitten)._ There, that's enough for _me_,
Mum. Jest take that dawg out at once, please.

_Owner of the dog (which, having gained its point, affects an air of
innocent detachment)._ I shall do nothing of the kind. It was the brutal
way you took hold of her. The _gentlest_ creature! Why, I've _had_ her
three years!

_Assistant._ I don't care if you've 'ad her a century. They're all
angels as come 'ere; but I ain't going to 'ave _my_ thumb bit by no
angels, so will you kindly walk out?

_Owner._ Without a muzzle? Never!

_Assistant._ Then I shall 'ave to call in a constable to make you. I'm
not bound to sell you nothing.

_Owner (with spirit). Call_ a constable then! _I_ don't care. Here I
stay till I get that muzzle.

_Assistant (giving up his idea of calling a constable)._ Then I should
advise you to take a chair, Mum, as we don't close till seven.

_Owner (retreating with dignity)._ All _I_ can say is that I call it
perfectly disgraceful. I shall certainly report your conduct; and I only
hope you won't sell a single other muzzle to-day!

_Assistant._ If I didn't I could bear up. _(To a lady with an elderly
Blenheim)_ If it's a muzzle, Mum--

_The Owner of the Blenheim_. That's just what I want to know. _Must_ he
have a muzzle? You see, he's got no teeth, so he couldn't possibly bite
anyone--now, _could_ he?

_Assistant. I_ dunno, Mum. You take 'im to see the Board of Agriculture.
_They'll_