itui and now it's Tromo Titonui. I'm going to say
again, quite seriously, that I don't believe you ever were in Hawaii
at all."

"Of course I wasn't," he replied. "But what is one to do in a railway
carriage, with nothing to read, and a drenched world and those two
words staring one in the face?" and he pointed to a placard above my
head advertising a firm which provided the best and cheapest Motor
Tuition.

* * * * *

DEMOBILISED.

Daddy's got his civvies on:
In his room upstairs
You should have heard him stamping round,
Throwing down the chairs;
When I went to peep at him
Daddy banged his door....
Well, I think I'll hide from Daddy
Till the next Great War!

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Exhausted Shopman_. "WELL, SIR, YOU'VE HAD ON EVERY
HAT IN THE PLACE. I'M SURE I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SUGGEST."

_Fastidious Warrior_ (_hopelessly_). "NO, I SEE NOTHING FOR IT BUT
TO REMAIN IN THE ARMY."]

* * * * *

OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.

(_BY MR. PUNCH'S STAFF OF LEARNED CLERKS._)

MR. ARNOLD BENNETT'S new novel, _The Roll Call_ (HUTCHINSON), is
a continuation of the _Clayhanger_ series to the extent that its
hero, _George Cannon_, is the stepson of _Edwin_, who himself makes
a perfunctory appearance at the close of the tale. The scene is,
however, now London, where we watch _George_ winning fame and fortune,
quite in the masterful Five-Towns manner, as an architect. The change
is, I think, beneficial. That quality of unstalable astonishment,
native to Mr. BENNETT's folk, accords better with the complexities
of the wonderful city than to places where it had at times only
indifferent matter upon which to work. But it is noticeable that Mr.
BENNETT can communicate this surprise not only to his characters but
to his readers. There is an enthusiasm, real or apparent, in his art
which, like the beam celestial, "evermore makes all things new," so
that when he tells us, as here, that there are studios in Chelsea
or that the lamps in the Queen's Hall have red shades, these facts
acquire the thrill of sudden and almost startling discovery. I suppose
this to be one reason for the pleasure that I always have in his
books; another is certainly the intense, even passionate sympathy
that he lavishes upon the central character. In the present example
the affairs of _George Cannon_ are shown developing largely under the
s