itish taxpayer is now paying
cheerfully and willingly, in addition to such trifling impositions as
a 60 per cent tax on his commercial profits, income tax at the rate of
twenty-five cents in the dollar.

On the other side of the account, _Life_, the American equivalent of
_Punch_, (if it is possible for the humour of a particular nation to
find its equivalent in any other nation), published not long ago a
special "John Bull" number, which will for ever remain a monument of
journalistic generosity and international courtesy. _Life's_ good deed
was gracefully acknowledged by _Punch_ and _The Spectator_.

But in spite of _Life's_ good example, enough has been said under this
head to illuminate the fact that a common language is a doubtful
blessing. The joint possession of the tongue that Shakespeare and
Milton and Longfellow and Abraham Lincoln spoke has bestowed little
upon our two nations but a convenient medium, too often, for shrewish
altercation, coupled with the profound conviction of either side that
the other side is unable to speak correct English.

Well, this nonsense must stop.

CHAPTER SIX

Therefore, whenever a true American and a true Briton get together,
let them hold an international symposium of their own. If it were not
for the unfortunate interposition of the Atlantic Ocean, this
interview would be extended, with proportional profit, to the greatest
symposium the world has ever seen. Meanwhile, we will make shift with
a company of two.

The following counsel is respectfully offered to the participants in
the debate.

Let the Briton remember:--

1. Remember you are talking to a _friend_.

2. Remember you are talking to a man who regards his nation as
the greatest nation in the world. He will probably tell you
this.

3. Remember you are talking to a man whose country has made an
enormous contribution to your cause in men, material, and
money, besides putting up with a good deal of inconvenience
and irksome supervision at your hands. Remember, too, that
your own country has made little or no acknowledgement of
its indebtedness in this matter.

4. Remember you are talking to a man who believes in
"publicity," and who believes further, that if you do not
advertise the fact, you cannot possibly be in possession of
"the goods." So for any sake open up a little, and tell him
all you can about what the British Nation is doing t