e what you can do. Vash up these. _(Points to dirty plates.)_

_Prince:_ Those! Why, that is scullion's work!

_Head Cook:_ Yes, and there is a scullion's place all ready.

_Prince (indignantly):_ A scullion! I had meant a place with
horses--in the garden--where I might work out-of-doors.

_Kitchen:_ O dear, kind young man, pray, pray do not speak like that.

_Cooklet:_ Oh, we beseech you, take the place! _(Both fall on knees
before him.)_

_Prince_: Why, what's the matter?

_Kitchen_: If there's no scullion here we have to guard the Christmas
pie, and if we guard the pie we d-d-die!

_Prince_: What danger threatens you?

_Both_: The Brownies!

_Prince_: Brownies! What are Brownies?

_Head Cook_: Vy, vat sort of kitchen have you lived in, if you have
never seen ze Brownies?

_Prince_: Oh, I was more like a friend than a page to my master, sir,
and the fact is, I've never been in a kitchen before. Er--what are
Brownies?

_(Brownies cackle with laughter outside.)_

_Head Cook_: Zey are ze evilest leetle beasts in all ze vorld! Venever
you sink you are rid of zem, zere zey are at your elbow. (_Brownies
laugh again_.) Vey steal, zey pinch, zey poke, zey pry, and at night,
ven all ze house is still, zey come out, and if you do not keep your
eyes ver' wide awake zey vill pinch you till you die--zat is, ven you
guard the Christmas pie.

_Prince_: I? Oh, this pleasant little job is meant for me--me? I thank
you, sir? (_Indignantly takes up his cap, preparing to go_.)

_Head Cook_: Not so fast, young man. Zey will come, yes; zey vill
try to steal, yes--but zere is vun sing zat vill send them avay
quick--slick--like zat. It is--RED PEPPER!

_Prince_: Red Pepper! How dare you call me that?

_Head Cook_: Eh?

_Prince_: Who told you I was called Red Pepper?

_Head Cook_: You?

_Prince_: Why, yes. Did you not mean me?

_Head Cook_: Why no. I mean red pepper, from the pepper-pot (_taking
it off shelf_).

_Prince_: Strange, for that's the name by which I'm known among my
people. Why--sir--how can red pepper help me against the Brownies.

DUET (_Cook_ and _Prince_).

(Air: "There Lived a King, as I've Been Told."--_The Gondoliers_.)

_Cook_: Now very hard it is to make
A Brownie his bad ways forsake,
For it's a fact he takes the cake,
If he can't find the candy!
And if you clap your hands and shoo,
He'll only make a face at you;
There's only one thing you can do--
Just keep the p