choice. The marriage of children should not be forced. Mutual love is the
basis of a proper union, because marriage is a voluntary compact. When
parents, therefore, force their children into an alliance, they usurp their
undoubted natural and religious rights. Hence there should be no _must_,
where there is no _will_, on the part of the child. That choice which is
made upon any other than reciprocated affection, is an unreasonable and
irreligious one. "Parents have no right," says Paley, "to urge their
children upon marriage to which they are averse;" "add to this," says he,
"that compulsion in marriage necessarily leads to prevarication; as the
reluctant party promises an affection, which neither exists, nor is
expected to take place." To proceed to marriage, therefore in the face of
absolute dislike and revulsion, is irrational and sinful.

As true, mutual love is the basis of marriage, so also should it be a
standard of our judgment in the marriage choice. Without it, neither
beauty, wealth, nor rank will make home happy. True love should be such as
is upheld in scripture. It is above mere passion. It never faileth. It is
life-like and never dies out. It is an evergreen in the bosom of home. It
has moral stamina, is regulated by moral law, has a moral end, contains
moral principle, and rises superior to mere prudential considerations. It
is more than mere feeling or emotion; it is not blind, but rational, and
above deception, having its ground in our moral and religious nature. It
extends to the whole person, to body, mind, and spirit, to the character as
well as to the face and form. It is tempered with respect, yea, vitalized,
purified, directed and elevated by true piety. Such love alone will survive
the charms and allurements of novelty, the fascinations of sense, the
ravages of disease and time, and will receive the sanction of heaven.

Mutual adaption of character and position is another scripture standard of
judgment. Is that person suited for me? Will that character make my home
happy? Could I be happy with such an one? Are we congenial in spirit,
sentiment, principle, cultivation, education, morals and religion? Can we
sympathize and work harmoniously together in mind and heart and will and
taste? Are we complemental to each other? These are questions of far
greater importance than the question of wealth, of beauty, or of rank.

Fitness of circumstances, means, and age should be also considered. Am I
able to