audience of about one
hundred people.

No one who has not been in the situation can form any idea of the
nervous feeling of a _debutant_ on such an occasion. The troupe, with
the exception of Eugenia, was of a description of persons whom I
despise, and the audience mostly clodhoppers, who could scarcely read
or write; yet I was abashed, and acquitted myself badly, until the
balcony scene, when I became enlivened and invigorated by the presence
and smiles of my mistress. In the art of love-making I was at home,
particularly with the Juliet of that night. I entered at once into the
spirit of the great dramatist, and the curtain dropped amidst thunders
of applause. My name was announced for a repetition of the play, and
I was dragged forward before the curtain, to thank the grocers,
tallow-chandlers, cheesemongers, and ploughmen for the great honour
they had done me. Heavens! how I felt the degradation; but it was too
late.

The natural result of this constant intercourse with Eugenia may
easily be anticipated. I do not attempt to extenuate my fault--it was
inexcusable, and has brought its punishment; but for poor, forlorn
Eugenia I plead; her virtue fell before my importunity and my personal
appearance. She fell a victim to those unhappy circumstances of which
I basely took the advantage.

Two months I had lived with her, as man and wife; I forgot my family,
profession, and even Emily. I was now upon the ship's books; and
though no one knew anything of me, my father was ignorant of my
absence from the ship--everything was sacrificed to Eugenia. I acted
with her, strolled the fields, and vowed volumes of stuff about
constancy. When we played, we filled the house; and some of the more
respectable townspeople offered to introduce us to the London boards,
but this we both declined. We cared for nothing but the society of
each other.

And now that time has cooled the youthful ardour that carried me away
let me do justice to this unfortunate girl. She was the most natural,
unaffected and gifted person I ever met with. Boundless wit,
enchanting liveliness, a strong mind, and self-devotion towards me,
the first, and, I firmly believe, the only object she ever loved; and
her love for me ceased only with her life. Her faults, though not to
be defended, may be palliated and deplored, because they were the
defects of education. Her infant days were passed in scenes of
domestic strife, profligacy, and penury; her maturer years,