e seem to live on the
principle that if a friend is in a swamp, it is necessary to plunge in
with him; and that if the other man is up to his waist, the sympathizer
shows his friendliness by allowing the mud to come up to his neck.
Whereas, it is evident that the deeper my friend is immersed in a
swamp, the more sure I must be to keep on firm ground that I may help
him out; and sometimes I cannot even give my hand, but must use a long
pole, the more surely to relieve him from danger. It is the same with a
mental or moral swamp, or most of all with a nervous swamp, and yet so
little do people appreciate the use of this long pole that if I do not
cry when my friend cries, moan when my friend moans, and persistently
refuse to plunge into the same grief that I may be of more real use in
helping him out of it, I am accused by my friend and my friend's friend
of coldness and want of sympathy. People have been known to refuse the
other end of your pole because you will not leave it and come into the
swamp with them.

It is easy to see why this mistaken sympathy is the cause of great
unnecessary nervous strain. The head nurse of a hospital in one of our
large cities was interrupted while at dinner by the deep interest taken
by the other nurses in seeing an accident case brought in. When the man
was put out of sight the nurses lost their appetite from sympathy; and
the forcible way with which their superior officer informed them that
if they had any real sympathy for the man they would eat to gain
strength to serve him, gave a lesson by which many nervous sympathizers
could greatly profit.

Of course it is possible to become so hardened that you "eat your
dinner" from a want of feeling, and to be consumed only with sympathy
for yourself; but it is an easy matter to make the distinction between
a strong, wholesome sympathy and selfish want of feeling, and easier to
distinguish between the sham sympathy and the real. The first causes
you to lose nervous strength, the second gives you new power for
wholesome use to others.

In all the various forms of nervous strain, which we study to avoid,
let us realize and turn from false sympathy as one to be especially and
entirely shunned.

Sham emotions are, of course, always misdirected force; but it is not
unusual to see a woman suffering from nervous prostration caused by
nervous power lying idle. This form of invalidism comes to women who
have not enough to fill their lives in nece