ober senses ever did talk; and the things that happen to them are
not like the things that ever happen to me or any of my
acquaintance. They are at home one minute, and beyond sea the next;
beggars to-day, and lords to-morrow; waiting-maids in the morning,
and duchesses at night. Nothing happens in a natural gradual way, as
it does at home; they grow rich by the stroke of a wand, and poor by
the magic of a word; the disinherited orphan of this hour is the
overgrown heir of the next; now a bride and bridegroom turn out to
be brother and sister, and the brother and sister prove to be no
relations at all. You and I, master Worthy, have worked hard many
years, and think it very well to have scraped a trifle of money
together; you, a few hundreds, I suppose, and I a few thousands. But
one would think every man in these books had the bank of England in
his 'scrutoire. Then there is another thing which I never met with
in true life. We think it pretty well, you know, if one has got one
thing, and another has got another. I will tell you how I mean. You
are reckoned sensible, our parson is learned, the squire is rich, I
am rather generous, one of your daughters is pretty, and both mine
are genteel. But in these books (except here and there one, whom
they make worse than Satan himself), every man and woman's child of
them, are all wise, and witty, and generous, and rich, and handsome,
and genteel; and all to the last degree. Nobody is middling, or good
in one thing, and bad in another, like my live acquaintance; but it
is all up to the skies, or down to the dirt. I had rather read Tom
Hickathrift, or Jack the Giant Killer, a thousand times.

_Worthy._ You have found out, Mr. Bragwell, that many of these books
are ridiculous; I will go further, and say, that to me they appear
wicked also; and I should account the reading of them a great
mischief, especially to people in middling and low life, if I only
took into the account the great loss of time such reading causes,
and the aversion it leaves behind for what is more serious and
solid. But this, though a bad part, is not the worst. These books
give false views of human life. They teach a contempt for humble and
domestic duties; for industry, frugality, and retirement. Want of
youth and beauty is considered in them as ridiculous. Plain people,
like you and me, are objects of contempt. Parental authority is set
at naught. Nay, plots and contrivances against parents and guardians
f