ia.

Yours,

Hennery.

CHAPTER XX.

The Bad Boy Tells About the Land of the Czar and the Trouble
They Had to Get There--Dad Does a Stunt and Mixes It Up with
the People and Soldiers.

St. Petersburg, Russia.--My Dear Groceryow-ski: Well, sir, I 'spose
you will be surprised to hear from me in Russia, but there was no use
talking when Dad said he was going to St. Petersburg if it was the last
act of his life. He got talking with a Japaneser in Rome and the Jap
said the war in the far east would last until every Russian was killed,
unless America interfered to put a stop to it, and as Roosevelt didn't
appear to have sand enough to offer his services to the czar, what it
needed was for some representative American citizen who was brave and
had nerve to go to St. Petersburg and see the czarovitch and give him
the benefit of a good American talk. The Jap said the American who
brought about peace, by a few well chosen remarks, would be the greatest
man of the century, and would live to be bowed down to by kings and
emperors and all the world would doff hats to him.

At first dad was a little leary about going on such a mission without
credentials from Washington, but as luck would have it, he met an exiled
Russian at a restaurant, who told dad that he reminded him of Gen.
Grant, because dad had a wart on the side of his nose, and he told
dad that Russia would keep on fighting until every Japanese was killed
unless some distinguished American should be raised up who deemed it
his duty to go to St. Petersburg and see the Little Father, and in
the interest of humanity advise the czar to call a halt before he had
exterminated the whole yellow race. Dad asked the Russian if he thought
the czar would grant an audience to an American of eminence in his own
country, and the Russian told dad that Nicholas just doted on Americans,
and that there was hardly ever an American ballet dancer that went to
Russia but what the czar sent for her to come and see him and dance
before the grand dukes, and he always gave them jewels and cans of
caviar as souvenirs of their visit.

[Illustration: The Russian told dad that Nicholas just doted on
Americans 250]

Dad thought it over all night, and the next morning we started for
Russia and I wish we had joined an expedition to discover the North Pole
instead of coming here. Say, it is harder to get into Russia than it
would be to get out of a penitentiary at home. At the