you going to get 'em home, Curtenty?' asked Gordon, with coarse
sarcasm; 'drive 'em?'

Nettled, Mr. Curtenty retorted:

'Now, then, Gas Gordon!'

The barmaid laughed aloud at this sobriquet, which that same evening
was all over the town, and which has stuck ever since to the Chairman of
the Gas and Lighting Committee. Mr. Gordon wished, and has never ceased
to wish, either that he had been elected to some other committee, or
that his name had begun with some other letter.

The gooseherd received the purchase-money like an affront, but when Mr.
Curtenty, full of private mirth, said, 'Chuck us your stick in,' he give
him the stick, and smiled under reservation. Jos Curtenty had no use for
the geese; he could conceive no purpose which they might be made to
serve, no smallest corner for them in his universe. Nevertheless, since
he had rashly stumbled into a ditch, he determined to emerge from it
grandly, impressively, magnificently. He instantaneously formed a plan
by which he would snatch victory out of defeat. He would take Gordon's
suggestion, and himself drive the geese up to his residence in Hillport,
that lofty and aristocratic suburb. It would be an immense, an
unparalleled farce; a wonder, a topic for years, the crown of his
reputation as a card.

He announced his intention with that misleading sobriety and
ordinariness of tone which it has been the foible of many great
humorists to assume. Mr. Gordon lifted his head several times very
quickly, as if to say, 'What next?' and then actually departed, which
was a clear proof that the man had no imagination and no soul.

The gooseherd winked.

'You be rightly called "Curtenty," mester,' said he, and passed into the
Tiger.

'That's the best joke I ever heard,' Jos said to himself 'I wonder
whether he saw it.'

Then the procession of the geese and the Deputy-Mayor commenced. Now, it
is not to be assumed that Mr. Curtenty was necessarily bound to look
foolish in the driving of geese. He was no nincompoop. On the contrary,
he was one of those men who, bringing common-sense and presence of mind
to every action of their lives, do nothing badly, and always escape the
ridiculous. He marshalled his geese with notable gumption, adopted
towards them exactly the correct stress of persuasion, and presently he
smiled to see them preceding him in the direction of Hillport. He
looked neither to right nor left, but simply at his geese, and thus the
quidnuncs of the market-pl