but madam was so
taken up with her sparks, she had quite forgot it. I spake for it again,
and with some temper, but was answered after a most taunting manner, not
without a toss of the head, a contraction of the nostrils, and other
impertinences, too many to enumerate. Seeing myself thus publicly
insulted by such an animal, I could not choose but show my resentment.
Woman, said I, sternly, I want a dish of rice tea, and not what your
vanity and impudence may imagine; therefore treat me as a gentleman and a
customer, and serve me with what I call for: keep your impertinent
repartees and impudent behaviour for the coxcombs that swarm round your
bar, and make you so vain of your blown carcase. And indeed I believe
the insolence of this creature will ruin her master at last, by driving
away men of sobriety and business, and making the place a den of
vagabonds and rakehells.

Gentlemen, therefore, ought to be very circumspect in their behaviour,
and not undervalue themselves to servant-wenches, who are but too apt to
treat a gentleman ill whenever he puts himself into their power.

Let me now beg pardon for this digression, and return to my subject by
proposing some practicable methods for regulating of servants, which,
whether they are followed or not, yet, if they afford matter of
improvement and speculation, will answer the height of my expectation,
and I will be the first who shall approve of whatever improvements are
made from this small beginning.

The first abuse I would have reformed is, that servants should be
restrained from throwing themselves out of place on every idle vagary.
This might be remedied were all contracts between master and servant made
before a justice of peace, or other proper officer, and a memorandum
thereof taken in writing. Nor should such servant leave his or her place
(for men and maids might come under the same regulation) till the time
agreed on be expired, unless such servant be misused or denied
necessaries, or show some other reasonable cause for their discharge. In
that case, the master or mistress should be reprimanded or fined. But if
servants misbehave themselves, or leave their places, not being regularly
discharged, they ought to be amerced or punished. But all those idle,
ridiculous customs, and laws of their own making, as a month's wages, or
a month's warning, and suchlike, should be entirely set aside and
abolished.

When a servant has served the limited time duly a