te, to read, to think about; but
how about those who do not care for reading, who write with
difficulty, or who can neither read nor write? Then again, I look
forward to only six nights in this stone vault; but how about those
who must look forward to an endless series of nights, month after
month, year after year, five, ten, fifteen, twenty years, life?

My God! How do they ever stand it?

Until nine o'clock, when the lights will go out, I am my own master;
my own master in a world of four feet by seven and a half, in which I
am the only inhabitant. Other human beings are living all about--on
either side, at the back, above, below; yet separated by double thick
stone walls from every other living creature in this great community,
I am absolutely solitary. I have never felt so curiously, desperately
lonely. The loneliness in the midst of crowds is proverbial; but the
loneliness in the midst of a crowd of invisible human beings--not
one of whom do you even hear--that has in it an element of heavily
weighted horror which is quite indescribable. It can only be felt.

The curious sensation of nervous resentment, noticed this noon, is
upon me in greater force to-night. If I were to just let myself go, I
believe I should soon be beating my fists on the iron grated door of
my cage and yelling. Of course I shall do nothing so foolish, but I
feel the impulse distinctly. I wonder how I shall stand a week of
this. I must certainly keep my nerves under better control, at
present they are quivering at the slightest sound.

This has certainly been one of the most interesting days of my life, and
the afternoon more interesting than the morning. I wish I could describe
it adequately.

The interval between dinner and the march to the shop is occupied chiefly
by writing this journal; but I also have a pleasant call from the
Chaplain's assistant, Dickinson. He does not bring me the book I selected
this morning, but in its place another book and some magazines, for none
of which do I care. What I do care about is the pleasant chat we have. Not
many words have been exchanged before he drops the books he is engaged in
distributing along the cells and dashes off; soon returning with
photographs of his wife and three charming children. He himself is a
clean-cut, fine-looking fellow, with honest blue eyes and a good face--not