This mood of Jack's was a singular one. He was evidently undergoing
great distress of mind. Under such circumstances as these, no levity
could be thought of. Had he not been so desperate, I might have
ventured upon a jest about the widow driving the others from the field
and coming forth victorious; but, as it was, there was no room for
jest. So I simply sat in silence, and returned his gaze.

"Well?" said he at last, impatiently.

"Well?" said I.

"Haven't you got any thing to say about that?"

"I don't know what to say. Your manner of telling this takes me more by
surprise than the thing itself. After all, you must have looked forward
to this."

"Looked forward? I'll be hanged if I did, except in a very general way.
Damn it, man! I thought she'd have a little pity on a fellow, and allow
me some liberty. I didn't look forward to being shut up at once."

"At once? You speak as though the event were near."

"Near? I should think it was. What do you say to next week? Is that
near or not? Near? I should rather think so."

"Next week? Good Lord! Jack, do you really mean it? Nonsense!"

"Next week--yes--and worse--on Tuesday--not the end, but the beginning,
of the week--Tuesday, the 20th of June."

"Tuesday, the 20th of June!" I repeated, in amazement.

"Yes, Tuesday, the 20th of June," said Jack.

"Heavens, man! what have you been up to? How did it happen? Why did you
do it? Couldn't you have postponed it? It takes two to make an
agreement. What do you mean by lamenting over it now? Why didn't you
get up excuses? Haven't you to go home to see about your estates? Why,
in Heaven's name, did you let it be all arranged in this way, if you
didn't want it to be?"

Jack looked at me for a few moments very earnestly. "Why didn't I?"
said he, at length; "simply because I happen to be an unmitigated,
uncontrollable, incorrigible, illimitable, and inconceivable ASS!
That's the reason why, if you must know."

Jack's very forcible way of putting this statement afforded me no
chance whatever of denying it or combating it. His determination to be
an ass was so vehement, that remonstrance was out of the question. I
therefore accepted it as a probable truth.

For some time I remained silent, looking at Jack, and puffing solemnly
at my pipe. In a situation of this kind, or in fact in any situation
where one is expected to say something, but doesn't happen to have any
thing in particular to say, there's nothing in the worl