I am to be obliged for to any one, must be alone
for the distress sake. That, therefore, he will have nothing to hope for
from this step that he had not before: and that in ever light I
reserve to myself to accept or refuse his address, as his behaviour and
circumspection shall appear to me to deserve.'

I tell him, 'That I think it best to go into a private lodging in the
neighbourhood of Lady Betty Lawrance; and not to her ladyship's house;
that it may not appear to the world that I have refuged myself in his
family; and that a reconciliation with my friends may not, on that
account, be made impracticable: that I will send for thither my faithful
Hannah; and apprize only Miss Howe where I am: that he shall instantly
leave me, and go to London, or to one of Lord M.'s seats; and as he had
promised not to come near me, but by my leave; contenting himself with a
correspondence by letter only.

'That if I find myself in danger of being discovered, and carried back
by violence, I will then throw myself directly into the protection
either of Lady Betty or Lady Sarah: but this only in case of absolute
necessity; for that it will be more to my reputation, for me, by the
best means I can, (taking advantage of my privacy,) to enter by a second
or third hand into a treaty of reconciliation with my friends.

'That I must, however, plainly tell him, 'That if, in this treaty, my
friends insist upon my resolving against marrying him, I will engage
to comply with them; provided they will allow me to promise him, that I
will never be the wife of any other man while he remains single, or is
living: that this is a compliment I am willing to pay him, in return for
the trouble and pains he has taken, and the usage he has met with on
my account: although I intimate, that he may, in a great measure, thank
himself (by reason of the little regard he has paid to his reputation)
for the slights he has met with.'

I tell him, 'That I may, in this privacy, write to my cousin Morden,
and, if possible, interest him in my cause.

'I take some brief notice then of his alternatives.'

You must think, my dear, that this unhappy force upon me, and this
projected flight, make it necessary for me to account to him much sooner
than I should otherwise choose to do, for every part of my conduct.

'It is not to be expected, I tell him, that your mother will embroil
herself, or suffer you or Mr. Hickman to be embroiled, on my account:
and as to his propo