hints for the Pall Mall
Gazette, you are welcome to use them gratis. Now I am here, I wonder I
have never been here before, and that I have seen the Dieppe packet a
thousand times at Brighton pier without thinking of going on board her.
We had a rough little passage to Boulogne. We went into action as we
cleared Dover pier--when the first gun was fired, and a stout old lady
was carried off by a steward to the cabin; half a dozen more dropped
immediately, and the crew bustled about, bringing basins for the
wounded. The Colonel smiled as he saw them fall. 'I'm an old sailor,'
says he to a gentleman on board. 'I was coming home, sir, and we had
plenty of rough weather on the voyage, I never thought of being unwell.
My boy here, who made the voyage twelve years ago last May, may have
lost his sea-legs; but for me, sir--' Here a great wave dashed over the
three of us; and would you believe it? in five minutes after, the dear
old governor was as ill as all the rest of the passengers. When we
arrived, we went through a line of ropes to the custom-house, with a
crowd of snobs jeering at us on each side; and then were carried off by
a bawling commissioner to an hotel, where the Colonel, who speaks
French beautifully, you know, told the waiter to get us a petit dejeuner
soigne; on which the fellow, grinning, said, a 'nice fried sole,
sir,--nice mutton-chop, sir,' in regular Temple Bar English; and brought
us Harvey sauce with the chops, and the last Bell's Life to amuse us
after our luncheon. I wondered if all the Frenchmen read Bell's Life,
and if all the inns smell so of brandy-and-water!

"We walked out to see the town, which I dare say you know, and therefore
shan't describe. We saw some good studies of fishwomen with bare legs,
and remarked that the soldiers were very dumpy and small. We were glad
when the time came to set off by the diligence; and having the coupe
to ourselves, made a very comfortable journey to Paris. It was jolly to
hear the postillions crying to their horses, and the bells of the
team, and to feel ourselves really in France. We took in provender
at Abbeville and Amiens, and were comfortably landed here after about
six-and-twenty hours of coaching. Didn't I get up the next morning
and have a good walk in the Tuileries! The chestnuts were out, and the
statues all shining, and all the windows of the palace in a blaze. It
looks big enough for the king of the giants to live in. How grand it is!
I like the bar