Stuck quite inextricably in his gorge;
And to the end he never got beyond
The Mister, though a faithful friend and fond.

How sad to think this barrier was never
Demolished, broken down and swept away,
But still remained to sunder and to sever
Two of the choicest spirits of our day!
For MEREDITH, though radiant, genial, kind,
On this one point showed an inclement mind.

The case was simplified in days of eld;
HOMER, for instance, had no Christian name,
And an Athenian bookman, if impelled
To visit him at Chios, when he came
Across the blind old poet and beach-comber,
Addressed him probably _tout court_ as HOMER.

PYTHAGORAS was never Jack or Jim--
Names all unknown in ages pre-Socratic;
And SHORTER could not have accosted him
By _sobriquets_ endearing or ecstatic;
It would have certainly provoked a scene,
For instance, to have hailed him as "Old bean."

Then at the "Mermaid," had he been invited
As an illustrious brother of the quill,
Would "C.K.S.," I wonder, have delighted
To honour WILLIAM SHAKSPEARE as "Old Bill,"
And in the small uproarious hours A.M.
Have been in turn acclaimed as "Bully CLEM"?

Perchance; who knows? The mystery is sealed;
Hypothesis, though plausible, is vain;
What might have been can never be revealed,
But one momentous fact at least is plain:
We know from an authoritative quarter
That MEREDITH was never "George" to SHORTER.

* * * * *

THE TWOPENNY EGG.

The daily press informs us that we are "in sight of the twopenny egg."
On making inquiries we learn that this phenomenon will be invisible
at Greenwich, but may be viewed from the North of Scotland, a region
happily less inaccessible than many to which scientific expeditions
have in the past been made. At the time of writing opinions differ as
to the best point for observation, but it is probable that the island
of Foula, in the Shetland group, will be chosen.

* * * * *

"Masters and men are visibly strained by the crisis. They all
know that they are sitting on a volcano. The prelude is all
icy suspicion."--_Mr. JAMES DOUGLAS in "The Star"._

It won't be the volcano's fault if the ice doesn't get melted.

* * * * *

"The complainant was ascending the staircase of the club when he
met the defendant, who, speaking of Lemb