in marrying her than in
deserting her? He confessed to himself that he had been very wrong in
allowing the outer world to get such a hold upon him that the love of
a pure girl like Lily could not suffice for his happiness. But there
was the fact, and he found himself unable to contend against it. If
by any absolute self-sacrifice he could secure Lily's well-being, he
would not hesitate for a moment. But would it be well to sacrifice
her as well as himself?

He had discussed the matter in this way within his own breast, till
he had almost taught himself to believe that it was his duty to break
off his engagement with Lily; and he had also almost taught himself
to believe that a marriage with a daughter of the house of Courcy,
would satisfy his ambition and assist him in his battle with the
world. That Lady Alexandrina would accept him he felt certain, if he
could only induce her to forgive him for his sin in becoming engaged
to Miss Dale. How very prone she would be to forgiveness in this
matter, he had not divined, having not as yet learned how easily such
a woman can forgive such a sin, if the ultimate triumph be accorded
to herself.

And there was another reason which operated much with Crosbie, urging
him on in his present mood and wishes, though it should have given
an exactly opposite impulse to his heart. He had hesitated as to
marrying Lily Dale at once, because of the smallness of his income.
Now he had a prospect of considerable increase to that income.
One of the commissioners at his office had been promoted to some
greater commissionership, and it was understood by everybody that
the secretary at the General Committee Office would be the new
commissioner. As to that there was no doubt. But then the question
had arisen as to the place of secretary. Crosbie had received two or
three letters on the subject, and it seemed that the likelihood of
his obtaining this step in the world was by no means slight. It would
increase his official income from seven hundred a year to twelve, and
would place him altogether above the world. His friend, the present
secretary, had written to him, assuring him that no other probable
competitor was spoken of as being in the field against him. If such
good fortune awaited him, would it not smooth any present difficulty
which lay in the way of his marriage with Lily Dale? But, alas, he
had not looked at the matter in that light! Might not the countess
help him to this preferment?