heir church--a very
fine foolpit from California; an' now this town here very jealous, and
the people say that when you pay that horse's fine they will buy pine
windows, pine doors, and pine floor, _and give Halamua church hell?_

The novel (but in some cases exceedingly correct) pronunciation
of pulpit pleased me, yet my wrath was aroused at this scandalous
revelation of the plans of the villagers to beautify their church at my
expense. It was as bad as any church bazaar in Christendom.

As Harry surmised, I received a visit from a deputation the next
morning. They wanted me to come and see the destruction done to their
plantations by _my_ horse.

'But it's not my horse,' I said. 'I decline to hear anything about a
horse. There is no horse down in my stock list, nor an elephant.'

A dirty old ruffian with one eye and a tattooed face regarded me gravely
for a moment, and then asked me in a wheezy, husky voice if I knew that
Ananias and Sapphira were struck dead for telling lies.

'Of course,' I replied promptly, 'I saw them struck. My uncle in England
had them buried in his garden to improve the soil. And why do you come
here and tell me these things about a horse? If there _is_ a horse, and
it eats your bananas and sugar-cane, why don't you shoot it?'

This suggestion staggered the deputation, half of which scratched its
head meditatively. Then a tall, thin man, with an attenuated face like a
starved fowl, said sneeringly in English,--

'What for you want to make gammon you no savee about horse?'

His companions smiled approvingly; not that they understood a word of
English, but they evidently regarded the fowl-like creature as a learned
person who would give me a dressing down in my own language.

I looked at him with a puzzled expression, and then said to Harry,--

'What does this man say, Harry? I can't talk German. Can you?'

Harry grinned and shook his head; the rest of the deputation looked
angrily at the hatchet-faced man, and the member seated next to him told
him he ought to be ashamed of himself to pretend to be able to _vogahau
faka Beretania_ (talk English).

For some minutes no one spoke. Then the youngest member of the
deputation, a jolly, fat-faced young deacon, dressed in a suit of white
flannel, laughed merrily, and asked me for some tobacco. I gave them a
plug each all round, and the deputation withdrew. So having successfully
repudiated the horse and all his works, I felt satisfied.