None of your rascally '_dips_'--but sound,
Round, ten-penny moulds of four to the pound;--
And a shirt of the roughest and coarsest hair
For a year and a day, Sir Ingoldsby, wear!--
So may your qualms of conscience cease,
And the soul of the Soldier shall rest in peace!"

"Now, nay, Holy Father; now nay, now nay!
Less penance may serve!" quoth Sir Ingoldsby Bray.
"No champion free of the Cross was he;
No belted Baron of high degree;
No Knight nor Squire Did there expire;
He was, I trow, a bare-footed Friar!
And the Abbot of Abingdon long may wait,
With his monks around him, and early and late,
May look from loop-hole, and turret, and gate,
He hath lost his Prior--his Prior his pate!"

"Now Thunder and turf!" Pope Gregory said,
And his hair raised his triple crown right off his head--
"Now Thunder and turf! and out and alas!
A horrible thing has come to pass!
What! cut off the head of the Reverend Prior,
And say he was '_only_ (!!!) a bare-footed Friar!'--
'What Baron or Squire, Or Knight of the shire
Is half so good as a holy Friar?'
_O, turpissime! Vir nequissime!_
_Sceleratissime!--quissime!--issime!_
Never, I trow, have the _Servi servorum_
Had before 'em Such a breach of decorum,
Such a gross violation of _morum bonorum_,
And won't have again _saecula saeculorum_!--
Come hither to me, My Cardinals three,
My Bishops in _partibus_, Masters in _Artibus_,
Hither to me, A.B. and D.D.,
Doctors and Proctors of every degree!
Go fetch me a book, go fetch me a bell
As big as a dustman's!--and a candle as well--
I'll send him where--good manners won't let me tell!"

--"Pardon and grace!--now pardon and grace!"
--Sir Ingoldsby Bray fell flat on his face--
"_Mea culpa!_--in sooth I'm in pitiful case.
Peccavi! peccavi!--I've done every wrong!
But my heart it is stout and my arm it is strong,
And I'll fight for Holy Church all the day long;
And the Ingoldsby lands are broad and fair,
And they're here and they're there and I can't tell you where,
And the Holy Church shall come in for her share!"
Pope Gregory paused and he sat himself down,
And he somewhat relaxed his terrible frown,
And his Cardinals three they picked up his crown.

"Now if it be so that you own you've been wrong,
And your heart is so stout and your arm is so strong,
And you really will fight like a trump all day long;--
If the Ingoldsby lands do lie here and there,
And Holy Church shall come in for her share,--
Wh