to this problem is not always
successful.[247] Sexual association is a treacherous ground, because
our likes and dislikes turn upon temperamental traits rather than
on the judgment, or, at any rate, upon modes of judgment not clearly
analyzable in consciousness. An openness of manner in the relations
of the sexes is very charming, but a little more, and it is boldness,
or, if it relates to bodily habits, indecency. A modest behavior is
charming, but too much modesty is prudery. Under these circumstances,
when the suggestive effect of bodily habits is realized, but the
effect of a given bit of behavior cannot be clearly reckoned, and
when, at the same time, the effect produced by the action is felt to
be very important to happiness, it is to be expected that there should
often be a conflict between the tendency to follow a stimulus and
the tendency to inhibit it, a hovering between advance and retreat,
assent and negation--a disturbed state of attention, and an organic
hesitancy, resulting in the emotional overflow of blushing when the
act is realized or thought as improper.

But, however thin and movable the partitions between attraction and
disgust, every person is aware of certain standards of behavior,
derived either from the strain of personal relationship or by
imitation of current modes of behavior. The girl of the unclothed
races who takes in sitting a modest attitude is acting on the result
of experience. She may have been often annoyed by the attentions of
men at periods when their attention was not welcome, and in this case
the action is one of shrinking and avoidance. She doubtless has in
mind also that all females are not at all times attractive to all
males, that female boldness sometimes excites disgust, and that the
concealment of the person may be more attractive than its exposure.

This more or less instinctive recognition of the suggestive power
of her person and her corresponding attitude of modesty have been
assisted also by her observation of the experiences of other women,
and by the talk of the older women. I may add the following instances
to make it plain that the sexual relation is the object of much
attention from both sexes in primitive society, and furnishes occasion
for the interruption of the smooth flow of the attention and the
bodily activities. Describing the use of magic by the male Australians
in obtaining wives, Spencer and Gillen add:

In the case of charming, however, the in