wn. Among other topics she
introduced with her usual affability, she asked the poor woman if
she knew the Duchess of Devonshire? "Know her, (answered the woman,)
_everybody_ has cause to know her here; never was there a better lady
born." "I am afraid you are mistaken, (said her Grace); from what I
understand of her, she is no better than she should be." "I am sure
_you_ are no better than you should be, (returned the poor woman,) to
find fault with the Duchess; but you'll never be worthy to wipe her
shoes." "Well then, (rejoined her Grace,) I must be beholden to _you_,
as they are at present very dirty." The good woman perceiving the
awkward mistake, ran to perform the office with great humility, and
received an ample reward.

* * * * *

KITCHEN CONUNDRUM.

"Come Thomas," says Kitty, "pray make us a pun,--
You're goodnatured and never refuse;"

"Ask coachee," says Tom, "_he's_ the fellow for Fun,--
For he knows the way to _a-mews_."

Says coachee, "Why Thomas you puzzle my brains,
For you never can bridle your wit;"

"But how comes it, that I, tho' exposed to the _reins_
Ev'ry day, never _suffer a bit_?"

* * * * *

DEAR TIMES.

After the union with Ireland, when the Irish members had taken their
seats, one of them, in the heat of his maiden speech, blustered out,
"Now, dare Mr. Speaker," which, of course, set the house in an
immoderate fit of laughter. When the tumult had subsided, Sheridan
observed, "that the honourable gentleman was perfectly in order,
since, thanks to the ministry, everything at that time was
immoderately _dear_."

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