thinking to make themselves fairer than God
made them--a presumptuous audacity to make God untrue in his word; and he
heaps vehement curses upon the immodest practice. To this follows the
trimming and tricking of their heads, the laying out their hair to show,
which is curled, crisped, and laid out on wreaths and borders from ear to
ear. Lest it should fall down it is under-propped with forks, wires, and
what not. On the edges of their bolstered hair (for it standeth crested
round about their frontiers, and hanging over their faces like pendices
with glass windows on every side) is laid great wreaths of gold and
silver curiously wrought. But this is not the worst nor the tenth part,
for no pen is able to describe the wickedness. "The women use great ruffs
and neckerchers of holland, lawn, camerick, and such cloth, as the
greatest thread shall not be so big as the least hair that is: then, lest
they should fall down, they are smeared and starched in the Devil's
liquor, I mean Starch; after that dried with great diligence, streaked,
patted and rubbed very nicely, and so applied to their goodly necks, and,
withall, under-propped with supportasses, the stately arches of pride;
beyond all this they have a further fetch, nothing inferior to the rest;
as, namely, three or four degrees of minor ruffs, placed gradatim, step
by step, one beneath another, and all under the Master devil ruff. The
skirts, then, of these great ruffs are long and side every way, pleted
and crested full curiously, God wot."

Time will not serve us to follow old Stubbes into his particular
inquisition of every article of woman's attire, and his hearty damnation
of them all and several. He cannot even abide their carrying of nosegays
and posies of flowers to smell at, since the palpable odors and fumes of
these do enter the brain to degenerate the spirit and allure to vice.
They must needs carry looking-glasses with them; "and good reason," says
Stubbes, savagely, "for else how could they see the devil in them? for no
doubt they are the devil's spectacles [these women] to allure us to pride
and consequently to destruction forever." And, as if it were not enough
to be women, and the devil's aids, they do also have doublets and
jerkins, buttoned up the breast, and made with wings, welts, and pinions
on the shoulder points, as man's apparel is, for all the world. We take
reluctant leave of this entertaining woman-hater, and only stay to quote
from him a "fe