an excellent clergyman of my
acquaintance, who had not quite mastered the Christian philosophy of
turning the right cheek to those who smote the left, had business in the
City, and being anxious to see his broker, strayed into the Stock
Exchange, in utter ignorance of the great liberty he was committing.
Instantly known as an interloper, he was surrounded and hustled by some
dozen of the members. "What did he want?" "How dared he to intrude
there?"

"I wish to speak with a member, Mr. A----, and was not aware it was
against the rules to enter the building."

"Then we'll make you aware for the future," said a coarse but
iron-fisted jobber, prepared to suit the action to the word.

My friend disengaged himself as far as possible, and speaking in a calm
but authoritative tone, said, "Sirs, I am quite sure you do not mean to
insult, in my person, a minister of the Church of England; but take
notice, the first man who dares to molest me shall feel the weight of my
fist, which is not a light one. Stand by, and let me leave this
inhospitable place." They did stand by, and he rushed into the street
without sustaining any actual violence.

Practical joking, says an _habitue_, relieves the excitement of this
feverish gambling. The stockbrokers indulge in practical jokes which
would be hardly excusable in a schoolboy. No member can wear a new hat
in the arena of bulls and bears without being tormented, and his chapeau
irrecoverably spoiled. A new coat cannot be worn without peril; it is
almost certain to be ticketed "Moses and Son--dear at 18s. 6d." The
pounce-box is a formidable missile, and frequently nearly blinds the
unwary. As P. passes K.'s desk, the latter slily extends his foot in
order to trip him up; and when K. rises from his stool, he finds his
coat-tail pinned to the cushion, and is likely to lose a portion of it
before he is extricated. Yet these men are capable of extreme
liberality. Some years ago knocking off hats and chalking one another's
backs was a favourite amusement on the Stock Exchange, as a vent for
surplus excitement, and on the 5th of November a cart-load of crackers
was let off during the day, to the destruction of coats. The cry when a
stranger is detected is "Fourteen hundred," and the usual test question
is, "Will you purchase any new Navy Five per Cents., sir?" The moment
after a rough hand drives the novice's hat over his nose, and he is spun
from one to another; his coat-tails are often torn