you do not, say so, and I will be content to wait
your own time."

"It would be better, Mr. Saul, that you should not think of this any
more."

"No, Miss Clavering; that would not be better--not for me, for it would
prove me to be utterly heartless. I am not heartless. I love you dearly.
I will not say that I cannot live without you; but it is my one great
hope as regards this world, that I should have you at some future day as
my own. It may be that I am too prone to hope; but surely, if that were
altogether beyond hope, you would have found words to tell me so by this
time." They had now come to the gateway, and he paused as she put her
trembling hand upon the latch.

"I cannot say more to you now," she said.

"Then let it be so. But, Miss Clavering, I shall not leave this place
till you have said more than that. And I will speak the truth to you,
even though it may offend you. I have more of hope now than I have ever
had before--more hope that you may possibly learn to love me. In a few
days I will ask you again whether I may be allowed to speak upon the
subject to your father. Now I will say farewell, and may God bless you;
and remember this--that my only earthly wish and ambition is in your
hands." Then he went on his way toward his own lodgings, and she entered
the parsonage garden by herself.

What should she now do, and how should she carry herself? She would have
gone to her mother at once, were it not that she could not resolve what
words she would speak to her mother. When her mother should ask her how
she regarded the man, in what way should she answer that question? She
could not tell herself that she loved Mr. Saul; and yet if she surely
did not love him--if such love were impossible--why had she not said as
much to him? We, however, may declare that that inclination to ridicule
his passion, to think of him as a man who had no right to love, was gone
forever. She conceded to him clearly that right, and knew that he had
exercised it well. She knew that he was good and true and honest, and
recognized in him also manly courage and spirited resolution. She would
not tell herself that it was impossible that she should love him.

She went up at last to her room doubting, unhappy and ill at ease. To
have such a secret long kept from her mother would make her life
unendurable to her. But she felt that, in speaking to her mother, only
one aspect of the affair would be possible. Even though she loved him,
how