hostile criticism,
and it impeded her learning. Furthermore, she was not inclined to try
all of the mother-in-law's suggestions; she had books which took
diametrically the opposite point of view in some matters. There were
some warm discussions between the ladies, and a spirit of rebellion took
possession of the wife. This was emphasized by the fact that she found
herself very lonely and longed secretly for the hum and stir of the
office; for the deference and the courtesy she had received there.
Further, the distracted husband, in his roles of husband and son, found
himself displeasing both his wife and his mother. He tried to get the
girl to subordinate herself, since he knew that this would be impossible
for his mother. To this his wife acceded, but was greatly hurt in her
pride, felt somehow lowered, and became quite depressed. The house
seemed "like a prison with a cross old woman as a jailer", as she
expressed it.
Another factor of importance needs some space. The bridal year needs
seclusion, on account of a normal voluptuousness that attends it. No
outsider should witness the embraces and the kisses; no outsider should
be present to impede the tender talks and the outlet of feeling. It
sometimes happens that the elderly have a reaction against all
love-making; having outlived it they are disgusted thereby, they find it
animal like, though indeed it is the lyric poetry of life. So it was in
this case; the mother was a third party where three is more than a
crowd, and she was a critical, disgusted third party. The young woman
found herself taking a similar attitude to the love-making, found
herself inhibiting her emotions and had a furtive feeling of being spied
on.
The previously strong, energetic girl quickly broke down. Physical
strength and energy may come entirely from a united spirit; a disunited
spirit lowers the physical endurance remarkably. She became disloyal to
matrimony, rebelled against housework, and yet loved her husband
intensely. A prey to conflicting ideas and emotions, she fell into a
circular thinking and feeling, where depressed thoughts cannot be
dismissed and depressed energy follows depressed mood. Prominent in the
symptoms were headache, sleeplessness, etc., for which the neurologist
was consulted.
How to remedy this situation was to tax the wisdom of a Solomon. It
probably would have remained insoluble, had not the statement I made
that the main element in the difficulty was the m
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