ring of the case in
April in the Rolls' Court Sir George Jessel decided that the deed of
separation was good as protecting Mr. Besant from any suit on my part to
obtain a decree for the restitution of conjugal rights, although it had
been set aside on the one matter of value to me--the custody of my child.
The net result of the proceedings was that had I gone to the Divorce
Court in 1873, I might at least have obtained a divorce _a mensa e
thoro_; that in my desire to avoid publicity, and content in what I
believed to be secure possession of my child, I had agreed to a deed
which fully protected Mr. Besant against any action on my part, but which
could be set aside by him for the purpose of robbing me of my child.

The argument in the Court of Appeal came on during April, and was, as I
expected, decided against me, the absolute right of the father being
declared, and a married mother held to have no sort of claim over her own
children. The worst stigma affixed to marriage by the law of England is
this ignoring of any right of the married mother to her child; the law
protects the unmarried, but insults the married, mother, and places in
the hands of the legal husband an instrument of torture whose power to
agonise depends on the tenderness and strength of the motherliness of the
wife. In fact the law says to every woman: "Choose which of these two
positions you will have: if you are legally your husband's wife you can
have no legal claim to your children; if legally you are your husband's
mistress, then your rights as mother are secure".

But one thing I gained in the Court of Appeal. The Court expressed a
strong view as to my right of access, and directed me to apply to Sir
George Jessel for it, stating that it could not doubt that he would give
it. I made the application and obtained an order of access to the
children, seeing them alone, once a month; of a visit of the children to
London twice a year, with their governess, for a week each time; of a
week at the seaside in similar fashion once a year; of a weekly letter
from each of them with the right of reply. This order, obtained after
such long struggle, has proved useless. The monthly visit so upset my
poor little daughter, and made her fret so constantly after me, that in
mercy to her I felt compelled to relinquish it; on the first visit to the
seaside, I was saddled with the cost of maintaining the Rev. Mr. and Mrs.
Child, who were placed as guardians of the chil