boldness, that at length I find I shall be forced to take some course or
other. God forbid that I should act the ridiculous part of a jealous
husband: the character is odious; but then I do not intend, through an
excess of patience, to be made the jest of the town. Judge, therefore,
from what I am going to tell you, whether I ought to sit down
unconcerned, or whether I ought to take measures for the preservation
of my honour.

"His royal highness honoured me yesterday by a visit to my wife."
Hamilton started at this beginning. "Yes," continued the other, "he did
give himself that trouble, and Lord Arran took upon himself that of
bringing him: do not you wonder, that a man of his birth should act such
a part? What advancement can he expect from one who employs him in such
base services? But we have long known him to be one of the silliest
creatures in England, with his guitar, and his other whims and follies."
Chesterfield, after this short sketch of his brother-in-law's merit,
began to relate the observations he had made during the visit, and asked
Hamilton what he thought of his cousin Arran, who had so obligingly left
them together. "This may appear surprising to you," continued he, "but
hear me out, and judge whether I have reason to think that the close of
this pretty visit passed in perfect innocence. Lady Chesterfield is
amiable, it must be acknowledged; but she is far from being such a
miracle of beauty as she supposes herself: you know she has ugly feet;
but perhaps you are not acquainted that she has still worse legs."
"Pardon me," said Hamilton, within himself: and the other continuing the
description: "Her legs," said his lordship, "are short and thick; and, to
remedy these defects as much as possible, she seldom wears any other than
green stockings."

Hamilton could not for his life imagine the drift of all this discourse,
and Chesterfield, guessing his thoughts: "Have a little patience," said
he: "I went yesterday to Miss Stewart's, after the audience of those
damned Muscovites: the king arrived there just before me; and as if the
duke had sworn to pursue me wherever I went that day, he came in just
after me. The conversation turned upon the extraordinary appearance of
the ambassadors. I know not where that fool Crofts had heard that all
these Muscovites had handsome wives; and that all their wives had
handsome legs. Upon this the king maintained that no woman ever had
such handsome legs as Miss Stewart;