without shoes,--For, said he, they would but spoil his sight,
--and a little peach-coloured bonnet with a great capon's feather in it--I
lie, for I think he had two--and a very handsome girdle of a sky-colour and
green (in French called pers et vert), saying that such a livery did become
him well, for that he had always been perverse, and in this plight bringing
him before Pantagruel, said unto him, Do you know this roister? No,
indeed, said Pantagruel. It is, said Panurge, my lord the king of the
three batches, or threadbare sovereign. I intend to make him an honest
man. These devilish kings which we have here are but as so many calves;
they know nothing and are good for nothing but to do a thousand mischiefs
to their poor subjects, and to trouble all the world with war for their
unjust and detestable pleasure. I will put him to a trade, and make him a
crier of green sauce. Go to, begin and cry, Do you lack any green sauce?
and the poor devil cried. That is too low, said Panurge; then took him by
the ear, saying, Sing higher in Ge, sol, re, ut. So, so poor devil, thou
hast a good throat; thou wert never so happy as to be no longer king. And
Pantagruel made himself merry with all this; for I dare boldly say that he
was the best little gaffer that was to be seen between this and the end of
a staff. Thus was Anarchus made a good crier of green sauce. Two days
thereafter Panurge married him with an old lantern-carrying hag, and he
himself made the wedding with fine sheep's heads, brave haslets with
mustard, gallant salligots with garlic, of which he sent five horseloads
unto Pantagruel, which he ate up all, he found them so appetizing.
And for their drink they had a kind of small well-watered wine, and some
sorbapple-cider. And, to make them dance, he hired a blind man that
made music to them with a wind-broach.

After dinner he led them to the palace and showed them to Pantagruel, and
said, pointing to the married woman, You need not fear that she will crack.
Why? said Pantagruel. Because, said Panurge, she is well slit and broke up
already. What do you mean by that? said Pantagruel. Do not you see, said
Panurge, that the chestnuts which are roasted in the fire, if they be whole
they crack as if they were mad, and, to keep them from cracking, they make
an incision in them and slit them? So this new bride is in her lower parts
well slit before, and therefore will not crack behind.

Pantagruel gave them a lit