his nose.

"Now look out of the window," said he. "To the left."

I obeyed at once. What I saw may not be described. I shrank back in
horror, for I saw so much real suffering that my own trouble grew less
in intensity.

"Now look me straight in the eye," said AEsculapius, an amused smile
playing about his lips.

I turned my vision straight upon his glasses and was abashed. I
averted my glance.

"Nonsense," said he, taking me by the shoulders. "Look at my
pupils--straight--don't be afraid--there! That's it. These glasses
won't hurt you, and, after all, I'm not very terrible," he added,
genially.

It required an effort, but I made it, although, in so doing, I seemed
to be turning my soul inside out for his inspection.

"H'm," breathed AEsculapius. "Rather serious. You think you have
appendicitis."

"Have I?" I cried.

AEsculapius laughed. "_Have_ you?" he asked. "What do you think you
think?"

"I think I have," said I, my heart growing faint at the very thought
I thought I was thinking.

"You are at least sure of your convictions," said AEsculapius. "Now, as
a matter of fact, the thoughts your thoughtful nature has induced you
to think are utterly valueless. You have a pain in your side?"

"Yes," said I. "And a very painful pain in my side--and I am not
putting on any side in my pain either," I added.

"No doubt," said AEsculapius. "But are you sure it is in your side, or
isn't it your chest that aches a trifle, eh?"

"Not much," said I, growing doubtful on the subject.

"Still it aches," said he.

"Yes," I answered, the pain in my side weakening in favor of one in my
chest. "It does." And it really did, like the deuce.

"Now about that pain in your chest," said AEsculapius. "Isn't it
rather higher up--in your throat, instead of your chest?"

My throat began to hurt, and abominably. Every particle of it throbbed
with pain, and my chest was immediately relieved.

"I think," said I, weakly, "that the pain _is_ rather in my throat
than in my chest."

"But your side doesn't ache at all?" suggested AEsculapius.

I had forgotten my side altogether.

"Not a bit," said I; and it didn't.

"So far, so good," said the doctor. "Now, my friend, about this throat
trouble of yours. Do you think you have diphtheria, or merely
toothache?"

I hadn't thought of toothache before, but as soon as the doctor
mentioned it, a pang went through my lower jaw, and my larynx seemed
all right again.

"Well, doctor,"