sweet--
A fact that scarcely odd is.
Gales half so cruel never beat
Against poor human bodies.
Cupid's attire is far too light
To weather Thirty Fahrenheit.

How can a glow the soul entrance,
When frostbite nips the finger,
And blushes quit the countenance
To nigh the nostril linger!
Warmth were a miracle, in sight
And grip of Thirty Fahrenheit.

Chill! chill to _me_, my Paradise!!
I'll not complain or curse on.
One cannot well be otherwise
To any mortal person.
Mere icebergs ambulant, we fight
Ferocious Thirty Fahrenheit.

Cold art thou? Not so cold as I--
Nought living could be colder.
I'm far too cold to sob or sigh,
Still less in passion smoulder.
I'm turning fast to something quite
As numb as Thirty Fahrenheit.

* * * * *

INFORMATION REQUIRED.--"Sir, I see a Volume advertised entitled,
_Unspoken Sermons_. I should be glad to know where these are preached,
as that's the place for yours truly, ONE WHO SNORES."

* * * * *

NEW BOOK OF IRISH LIFE.--_The Bedad's Sons_. By the Author of the tale
of Indian Life, _The Begum's Daughters_.

* * * * *

[Illustration: THE DELIGHTS OF TRIAL BY JURY.

THESE GENTLEMEN ARE EXPECTED TO BE IN A JUDICIAL FRAME OF MIND AFTER
HANGING ABOUT THE PRECINCTS OF THE COURT FOR SEVERAL DAYS, UNDER
PENALTY OF A HEAVY FINE, WHILE THEIR PRIVATE BUSINESS IN THE CITY AND
ELSEWHERE IS GOING TO THE DOGS. (WHY SHOULD NOT HALF-PAY OFFICERS DO
THE WORK, AND RELIEVE BUSY MEN?)]

* * * * *

ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.

_House of Commons, Thursday, January 22_.--Both Houses met to-day
after Christmas Recess. No QUEEN's Speech; no moving and seconding of
Address; no Royal Commission and procession of SPEAKER to Lords. All
seems strange, and spirits generally a little depressed. Only ROBERT
FOWLER rises superior to circumstances of hour. Blustering about the
Lobby "like Boreas," says CAUSTON.

[Illustration: King Yah! Yah!]

"Only not so rude," says HARRY LAWSON, jealous for the reputation of
Metropolitan Members, even though some sit on the Benches opposite.
With folded hands thrust behind coat-tails, rollicking stride,
thunderous voice, and blooming countenance, Sir ROBERT positively
pervades the Lobby. Personally receives POPE HENNESSY; shakes
hands with e