poignant regret. I hold
that tears are more genuine than words, for which reason the best
weeper has been preferred, and so has received the velvet suit.
Nevertheless, the loudest lamenter is not unworthy; and so I repeat
that he shall have the silk suit. If there be none who weep or lament
me, I direct that these two suits shall be given to the janitor of the
college, the old negro Fairfax, whose duty ever thereafter shall be to
praise and lament me.

"Second: I give my twelve other suits of various descriptions, more or
less rich, to the members of the 'Anti-Stamp-Act League,' of which I
am a member. This with my love; and I request that, whenever they
speak of me, they may say, 'Hoffland, our lamented, deceased brother,
was a man of expanded political ideas, and a true friend of liberty.'

"Third: I give all my swords, pistols, guns, carbines, short swords,
broad swords, poniards, and spurs, to my friend Mr. Denis, who has had
the misfortune to kill me. It is my request that he will not lament
me, or feel any pangs of conscience. So far from dying with the
thought that he has been unjust to me, I declare that his conduct has
been worthy of the Chevalier Bayard; and I desire that the above
implements of war may be used to exterminate even the whole world,
should they give him like cause of quarrel.

"Fourth: I give my books to those I am most intimately acquainted
with:--my Elzevir Horace to T. Randolph--he will find translations of
the best odes upon the fly leaves, much better than any he could make;
my Greek books, the Iliad, Graeca Minora, Herodotus, etc., which are
almost entirely free from dog-ears and thumb-marks, as I have never
opened them, I give to L. Burwell, requesting that he will thenceforth
apply himself to Greek in earnest. My Hebrew books I give to Fairfax,
the janitor, as he is the only one in the college who will not pretend
to understand them; thus, much deception will be warded off and
prevented.

"Fifth: I give and bequeath to the gentleman who passed us this
afternoon on horseback, and who is plainly deep in love with some
one--I believe he is known as Mr. Jacques--I bequeath to him my large
volume of love-songs in manuscript, begging him to read them for his
interest and instruction, and never, under any circumstances, to copy
them upon embossed paper and send them to his lady-love, pretending
that they are original, as I have known many forlorn lovers to do
before this.

"Sixth: I beq