fighting had long been used to perils of all sorts, should thus
cast aside my courage; that I, worn out by incessant controversies and
consumed by the daily wear and tear of writing, should care for an
inglorious match with so distinguished an antagonist; or that I should
have set my heart upon winning a bare victory in the midst of all this
dust and tumult. For not only was the result which has ensued unlooked for
in the nature of things and in the opinion of all men qualified to judge
in such a case; it was also the last thing I could have desired to happen,
for the sake of my good name. My judgment has ever been that all men (for
in sooth all of us are, so to speak, little less than nothing) may so lose
their heads in controversy that they may actually fight against their own
interests. And if such a mischance as this may happen to any man of
eminence--as has been my case, and the case of divers others I could
recall--it shall not be written down in the list of his errors, unless in
aftertimes he shall seek to justify the same. It is necessary to advance
roughness in the place of refinement, and stubborn tenacity for
steadfastness. No man can be pronounced guilty of offence on the score of
some hasty word or other which may escape his lips; such a charge should
rather be made when he defends himself by unworthy methods. Therefore if
Cardan during his life, being well advised in the matter, should have kept
silent over my attempts to correct him, what could have brought me greater
credit than this? He would have bowed to my opinion in seemly fashion, and
would have taken my censures as those of a father or a preceptor. But
supposing that he had ventured to engage in a sharper controversy with me
over this question, is there any one living who would fail to see that he
might have gone near to lose his wits on account of the mental agitation
which had afflicted him in the past? But as soon as his superhuman
intellect had thoroughly grasped the question, it seemed to him that he
must needs be called upon to bear what was intolerable. He could not pluck
up courage enough to bear it by living, so he bore it by dying. Moreover,
what he might well have borne, he could not bring himself to bear, to wit
that he and I should come to an agreement and should formulate certain
well-balanced decisions for the common good. For this reason I lament
deeply my share in this affair, I who had most obvious reasons for
engaging in this conf