on a plan for getting even, at least for
the once. Selecting an abstruse and very unfamiliar subject, they delved
into the Encyclopaedia Britannica and thoroughly posted themselves. The
question was one on which scientists differed and so the conspirators
took opposite sides, each prepared to maintain his view. At a convenient
moment during the next dinner when they met Mr. Gladstone, the subject
was sprung and immediately the two _disputants_ went at it, hammer and
tongs. For some time the fight raged hotly, no one else venturing to
take part in the discussion. The trick was working capitally and the
triumphant pair cast congratulating looks at one another. Mr. Gladstone
hadn't spoken a word. Finally the hostess, in a momentary lull in the
conflict, said: "What are your views about this matter, Mr. Gladstone;
which do you think right now?" "There is very little choice," returned
the sly old fox, turning with a good natured smile to the disputants, "I
made up my mind as to that when I wrote the article on the subject in
the Encyclopaedia Britannica, which, by the way, gentlemen, I see you
have been studying very carefully." There was a moment of embarassing
silence and then a roar. The conspirators acknowledged themselves fairly
beaten and since then they allow Mr. Gladstone the floor whenever he
signifies a wish to occupy it.

POINTS ON TOASTS.

The dinner in private house or club where the ladies are at table during
the toasts, is perhaps the most trying of all ordeals to the man not
blessed with nerve.

Toasts at dinner which are given in honor of some special guest are
necessarily of the most informal kind. A bit of interesting personal
reminiscence, with as much of the ego eliminated as possible, a good
story (always and always the good story) a compliment to the guest of
honor a few well chosen words (never fulsome) of praise for host and
hostess, and in closing a few lines complimentary to the ladies. This
pre-supposes one is expected to give a somewhat extended toast.
Ordinarily a story is sufficient. On one point never make a mistake--sit
down before your friends have had quite enough of you, never keep on
talking until the ladies vote you a bore and the men something more
decided.

The host should be the real toastmaster, though his formidable title is
concealed under the informal manner in which he draws out his guests. At
such a dinner the talks are very short; and generally between courses,
as no one