mposed upon
us; and we write to ask your Lordship to grant us some dispensation, lest
permanent plethora should ensue.

* * * * *

IN A GOOD CAUSE.

Mr. Punch desires to support very heartily Lord BERESFORD'S appeal on
behalf of the fine work of the Ladies' Emergency Committee of the Navy
League, who supply warm clothing to the crews of men-of-war and mercantile
auxiliaries; equipment to Naval hospitals, and parcels of food and other
necessaries to Naval prisoners of war. The strain upon the Committee's
resources has been very heavy, and Mr. Punch is confident that his friends
will not allow our gallant sea-services to suffer through any need which it
is within their power to supply.

Cheques may be made payable to Admiral Lord BERESFORD, and addressed to the
Hon. Secretary, Ladies' Emergency Committee of the Navy League, 56, Queen
Anne Street, Cavendish Street, W.

* * * * *

"L1 REWARD.--Lost, Umbrella, engraved W.C.B. 1865-1915."--_The Times_.

We do not believe that such a faithful friend is lost; it has simply gone
out to celebrate its jubilee.

* * * * *

"FOOD IN FRANCE.

A friend who was in France last week tells me that the only cheap
article of diet just now is eggs, which are about 1-1/2d. each. Meat,
he said, averages 5f. a kilo, which is about the equivalent of 5s. a
pound."--_Daily Mirror_.

No wonder we are not allowed to have the metric system.

* * * * *

[Illustration: HUMOURS OF A REMOUNT DEPOT.

_Sergeant._ "FRIGHTENED OF 'IM, ARE YOU? DIDN'T YOU 'AVE NOTHIN' TO DO WITH
ANIMALS BEFORE YE JOINED UP?"

_Recruit._ "YESSIR. I WAS A LION-TAMER."]

* * * * *

OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.

(_By Mr. Punch's Staff of Learned Clerks._)

MR. CONRAD'S new hero is an unnamed chief-mate who gets his first command
to a sailing vessel, also unnamed--queer and of course quite deliberate
instance of the author's reticent, allusive method which is so entirely
plausible. Her last captain, who had some mad savage hatred of ship and
crew, died aboard her and was buried in latitude 8 deg. 20'. The chief-mate,
who got the vessel back to port and remained under her new captain, is
convinced that the dead man haunts her vengefully; and one desperate
accident after another, racking a crew overwhelmed with fever, almost
persuades the ca