FREE BOOKS

Author's List




PREV.   NEXT  
|<   33   34   35   36   37   38   39   40   41   42   43   44   45   46   47   48   49   50   51   52   53   54   55   56   57  
58   59   60   61   62   63   64   65   66   67   68   69   70   71   72   73   74   75   76   77   78   79   80   81   82   >>   >|  
merous little acts that placed him in positions beneath the dignity of an author's standing were an incessant source of annoyance to him. She did not remain with him long, but he tried to perform his filial duties and make her comfortable, as various letters show. One of these reads as follows: "My dear Mother,--It is very difficult for me to enter into the engagement you ask of me, and to do so without reflection would entail consequences most serious both for you and for myself. The money necessary for my existence is, as it were, wrung from what should go to pay my debts, and hard work it is to get it. The sort of life I lead is suitable for no one; it wears out relations and friends; all fly from my dreary house. My affairs will become more and more difficult to manage, not to say impossible. The failure of my play, as regards money, still further complicates my situation. I find it impossible to work in the midst of all the little storms raised up in a household where the members do not live in harmony. My work has become feeble during the last year, as any one can see. I am in doubt what to do. But I must come to some determination within a few days. When my furniture has been sold, and when I have disposed of 'Les Jardies,' I shall not have much left. And I shall find myself alone in the world with nothing but my pen, and an attic. In such a situation shall I be able to do more for you than I am doing at this moment? I shall have to live from hand to mouth by writing articles which I can no longer write with the agility of youth which is no more. The world, and even relations, mistake me; I am engrossed by my work, and they think I am absorbed in myself. I am not blind to the fact, that up to the present moment, working as I work, I have not succeeded in paying my debts, nor in supporting myself. No future will save me. I must do something else, look out for some other position. And it is at a time like this that you ask me to enter into an engagement! Two years ago I should have done so, and have deceived myself. Now all I can say is, come to me and share my crust. You were in a tolerable position; I had a domestic whose devotion spared you all the worry of housekeeping; you were not called on to enter into every detail, you were quiet and peaceful. You wished me to count for something in your life, when it was imperative for you to forget my
PREV.   NEXT  
|<   33   34   35   36   37   38   39   40   41   42   43   44   45   46   47   48   49   50   51   52   53   54   55   56   57  
58   59   60   61   62   63   64   65   66   67   68   69   70   71   72   73   74   75   76   77   78   79   80   81   82   >>   >|  



Top keywords:

position

 

situation

 

relations

 

moment

 

impossible

 

engagement

 
difficult
 

agility

 

longer

 

writing


succeeded
 

articles

 

mistake

 

engrossed

 

working

 

present

 

positions

 

absorbed

 
beneath
 

standing


incessant

 
dignity
 

paying

 

author

 

housekeeping

 
called
 

spared

 
devotion
 

domestic

 

detail


imperative

 

forget

 

peaceful

 

wished

 

tolerable

 

merous

 

supporting

 
Jardies
 

future

 

deceived


annoyance
 
friends
 

letters

 
suitable
 
dreary
 
duties
 

failure

 

manage

 

affairs

 

comfortable