JUNO [furious] I won't be belittled.

MRS. LUNN [to Mrs. Juno] I hope you'll come and stay with us now that
you and Gregory are such friends, Mrs. Juno.

JUNO. This insane magnanimity--

MRS. LUNN. Don't you think you've said enough, Mr. Juno? This is a
matter for two women to settle. Won't you take a stroll on the beach
with my Gregory while we talk it over. Gregory is a splendid listener.

JUNO. I don't think any good can come of a conversation between Mr.
Lunn and myself. We can hardly be expected to improve one another's
morals. [He passes behind the chesterfield to Mrs. Lunn's end; seizes a
chair; deliberately pushes it between Gregory and Mrs. Lunn; and sits
down with folded arms, resolved not to budge].

GREGORY. Oh! Indeed! Oh, all right. If you come to that--[he crosses to
Mrs. Juno; plants a chair by her side; and sits down with equal
determination].

JUNO. Now we are both equally guilty.

GREGORY. Pardon me. I'm not guilty.

JUNO. In intention. Don't quibble. You were guilty in intention, as I
was.

GREGORY. No. I should rather describe myself guilty in fact, but not in
intention.

JUNO { rising and } What!
MRS. JUNO { exclaiming } No, really--
MRS. LUNN { simultaneously } Gregory!

GREGORY. Yes: I maintain that I am responsible for my intentions only,
and not for reflex actions over which I have no control. [Mrs. Juno
sits down, ashamed]. I promised my mother that I would never tell a
lie, and that I would never make love to a married woman. I never have
told a lie--

MRS. LUNN [remonstrating] Gregory! [She sits down again].

GREGORY. I say never. On many occasions I have resorted to
prevarication; but on great occasions I have always told the truth. I
regard this as a great occasion; and I won't be intimidated into
breaking my promise. I solemnly declare that I did not know until this
evening that Mrs. Juno was married. She will bear me out when I say
that from that moment my intentions were strictly and resolutely
honorable; though my conduct, which I could not control and am
therefore not responsible for, was disgraceful--or would have been had
this gentleman not walked in and begun making love to my wife under my
very nose.

JUNO [flinging himself back into his chair] Well, I like this!

MRS. LUNN. Really, darling, there's no use in the pot calling the
kettle black.

GREGORY. When you say darling, may I ask which of us you are addressing?