Revenue was defrauded on every possible occasion by
the sharp wits opposed to it; and the difficulty of conviction, unless
the smuggler was caught red-handed, was very considerable. The following
is a case in point, and for sheer impudence, it bears the palm. 17 Oct.:

MANSION HOUSE.--A Scotchwoman, named Frances Bodmore, the wife of a
Frenchman, who has been engaged in smuggling, appeared to answer for
her husband, on a charge of having two two-gallon bottles of French
brandy in his possession, without having paid the duty thereon.

Child, the constable, said he went into the house of the Frenchman,
in Sugarloaf Court; and, while searching for other things, found the
bottles under the pillows of the bed.

The Lord Mayor: Why don't your husband attend?

Woman: Why, because he knows nothing at all about the business. I
think he'd be a great fool to come here without knowing for what.

The Lord Mayor: How do you get your living?

Woman: Why, as well as I can. I don't get it without running some
risk for it, you may depend.

The Lord Mayor: We know you to be a consummate smuggler.

Woman: Whatever my business may be, I generally get through it like a
trump. There's no nonsense about me.

The Lord Mayor (to the Revenue officer): She is constantly backward
and forward between this and France, I daresay.

Woman: Yes, my Lord, I travel a good deal for the benefit of my
health, and I always come back stouter than I go. (Laughter.)

Officer: She's perfectly well known, my Lord, as one of a number that
are commissioned by parties in London. They are all very clever, and
elude us in every possible way, and the steamers afford them great
facilities.

The Lord Mayor: I can't send this woman to prison, and she knows it
well, but I shall punish every experienced smuggler I catch as
severely as I can. They cheat the fair trader, they endanger the
vessel in which they come over, and they cheat the Government.

Woman: Ay, my Lord, that's the cleverest thing of all. Only think of
cheating the Government! Well, well, I wonder where the villainy of
man will end! (Laughter.)

The Lord Mayor: Take care of yourself. You think you are secure.
You may go now.

Woman: Good morning, my Lord. Although you are so kind, I hope I
shall never have the pleasure of seeing your face again.