the extortionate charge of the house, and who gathered up your
quarter or half-dollar and slipped it into his pocket without a word, or
even an inarticulate murmur, of thanks?"

"Often. Outraged is no word for it."

"Yes," we assented, feeling our way delicately. "Has it ever happened
that in the exceptional case where the waiter has said, 'Thank you very
much,' or the like, you have responded with a cordial, 'You're welcome,'
or, 'Not at all'?"

"Certainly not."

"Why not?"

"Because--because--those are terms of politeness between--"

Our friend hesitated, and we interrogatively supplied the word, "Equals?
There are always difficulties between unequals. But try this, some day,
and see what a real gratitude you will get from the waiter. It isn't
infallible, but the chances are he will feel that you have treated him
like a man, and will do or say something to show his feeling: he will
give a twitch to your under-coat when he has helped you on with your
top-coat, which will almost pull you over. We have even tried saying
'You are welcome' to a beggar. It's astonishing how they like it.
By-the-way, have you the habit of looking at your waiter when he comes
to take your order; or do you let him stand facing you, without giving
him a glance above the lower button of his poor, greasy waistcoat?"

"No, the theory is that he is part of the mechanism of the
establishment."

"That is the theory. But it has its inconveniences. We ourselves used to
act upon it, but often, when we found him long in bringing our order, we
were at a loss which waiter to ask whether it would be ready some time
during the evening; and occasionally we have blown up the wrong waiter,
who did not fail to bring us to shame for our error."

"They do look so confoundedly alike," our visitor said, thoughtfully.

"We others look confoundedly alike to them, no doubt. If they studied us
as little as we study them, if they ignored us as contemptuously as we
do them, upon the theory that we, too, are part of the mechanism, the
next man would be as likely as we to get our dinner."

"They are paid to study us," our visitor urged.

"Ah, _paid_! The intercourse of unequals is a commercial transaction,
but when the inferiors propose to make it purely so the superiors
object: they want something to boot, something thrown in, some show of
respect, some appearance of gratitude. Perhaps those dairymaids did not
consider that they were paid to stand up when the