to state that my servant, in removing my smaller
luggage from the train, had accidentally carried off this Foreign Office
bag, which, though at considerable inconvenience, I had travelled much
out of my way to restore in person. I had practised this explanation as
I dressed in the morning, I had twice rehearsed it to an orange-tree in
the garden, before which I had bowed till my back ached, and I fancied
myself perfect in my part. It would, I confess, have been a great relief
to me to have had only the slightest knowledge of the great personage
before whom I was about to present myself, to have known was he short or
tall, young or old, solemn or easy-mannered, had he a loud voice and an
imperious tone, or was he of the soft and silky order of his craft. I'd
have willingly entertained his "gentleman" at a moderate repast for some
information on these points, but there was no time for the inquiry, and
so I rang boldly at the bell. The door opened of itself at the summons,
and I found myself in a large hall with a plaster cast of the Laocoon,
and nothing else. I tried several of the doors on either side, but they
were all locked. A very handsome and spacious stair of white marble
led up from the middle of the hall; but I hesitated about venturing to
ascend this, and once more repaired to the bell outside, and repeated my
summons. The loud clang re-echoed through the arched hall, the open door
gave a responsive shake, and that was all. No one came; everything
was still as before. I was rather chagrined at this. The personal
inconvenience was less offensive than the feeling how foreigners would
comment on such want of propriety, what censures they would pass on such
an ill-arranged household. I rang again, this time with an energy that
made the door strike some of the plaster from the wall, and, with a
noise like cannon, "What the hangman"--I am translating--"is all this?"
cried a voice thick with passion; and, on looking up, I saw a rather
elderly man, with a quantity of curly yellow hair, frowning savagely on
me from the balcony over the stair. He made no sign of coming down, but
gazed sternly at me from his eminence.

"Can I see his Excellency, the Minister?" said I, with dignity.

"Not if you stop down there, not if you continue to ring the bell like
an alarm for fire, not if you won't take the trouble to come upstairs."

I slowly began the ascent at these words, pondering what sort of a
master such a man must needs hav