of potatoes.
A FRIEND--Five pounds of beef, and a coat.
A FRIEND IN NEED--A shoulder of mutton.
A POOR WOMAN--A large damper.
AN EMIGRANT--Ten quarts of milk.
AN EMIGRANT--A frying-pan.

At first we were disposed to be amused with the heterogeneous nature of
the contributions, but, on reflection, we felt disposed to applaud a plan
which enabled every one to bestow a portion of any article of which he
possesses a superabundance. If, for instance, a similar subscription were
began here, we might expect to find the following contributions:--

SIR ROBERT PEEL--A large stock of political consistency.
LORD LONDONDERRY--An ounce of wit.
LORD NORMANBY--A complete copy of "Yes and No."
COLONEL SIBTHORP--A calf's-head, garnished.
THE BISHOP OF EXETER--His pastoral blessing.
LORD MELBOURNE AND LORD JOHN RUSSELL--A pair of cast-off slippers.
MR. WAKELY--A dish of Tory flummery.
DAN O'CONNELL--A prime lot of

[Illustration: REAL IRISH BUTTER.]

* * * * *

SONGS FOR THE SENTIMENTAL.--NO. 7.

Fair Daphne has tresses as bright as the hue
That illumines the west when a summer-day closes;
Her eyes seem like violets laden with dew,
Her lips will compare with the sweetest of roses.
By Daphne's decree I am doom'd to despair,
Though ofttimes I've pray'd the fair maid to revoke it.
"No--Colin I love"--(thus will Daphne declare)
"Put that in your pipe, if you will, sir, and smoke it."

Once I thought that she loved me (O! fatal deceit),
For she wore at the dance the gay wreath I had twined her;
She smiled when I swore that I envied each sweet,
And vow'd that in love's rosy chains I would bind her.
I press'd her soft hand, and a blush dyed her cheek;
"Oh! there's love," I exclaim'd, "in that eye's liquid glancing."
She spoke, and I think I can _still_ hear her speak--
"You know about love what a pig knows of dancing!"

* * * * *

JOE HUM(E)ANITY.

The "late of" Middlesex, during his visit to Switzerland, happened to be
charged, at a cottage half-way up the Jura, three farthings for seven
eggs. Astonished and disgusted at the demand, he vehemently declared that
things were come to a pretty

[Illustration: PASS IN THE MOUNTAINS]

* * * * *

THE MINISTERIAL TOP.

We understand Sir James Graham has lately been labouring under sev