reach her? Was her love such as mine? Such as is given to but one
alone? Or only as a brother did she love him? I must _know_ how it
was. Heaven grant that joy for one would not bring sorrow to the
other, I prayed. I had not long to wait. Her dreams became troubled.
Her lips quivered and trembled, and then with a cry of agony she
started up.

"'Gone, gone, gone!' she sobbed.

"It was many minutes ere I succeeded in calming and making her
understand 'twas but a dream.

"'Oh! but _so_ real, so _dreadfully_ real. I thought he did not care
for me. That he had gone and left me, and they told me he was
married!'

"Telling this, she began to sob again.

"'Lilly, dear, tell me truly--tell your sister, your very best
friend--how it is you love your doctor?' I asked.

"'How?' she returned. 'Oh, Edna, more than all the world! He is all
that I have lost and more; and if he should die, or I should lose him,
I would not wish to live. I _could_ not live. He loves me a little,
does he not, Edna?'

"I could not reply. Just then there was a terrible struggle going on
in my heart. _That_ must be ended, the victory won ere I could speak.
She waited for my answer and then said, eagerly:

"'Oh, speak, _do!_ What _are_ you thinking about?'

"Pressing back the sigh--back and far down into the poor heart--I gave
her the sweet, and kept the bitter part, when I could answer.

"'Yes, dear, I _do_ think he loves you a little now, and will,
by-and-by, love you dearly. God grant he may!'

"'Oh, you darling Edna! You have made me so happy!' she cried, kissing
me; and still caressing me she fell asleep.

"Next morning I enclosed the ring, with only these words:

"'Forgive if I cause you sorrow, and believe me your true
friend. I return the ring that I am not _free_ to accept.'

"I intended that my reply should mislead him, when I wrote that I was
not free, and thus to crush any hope that might linger in his heart.
While at breakfast that morning, we received a telegram that grandma
was extremely ill, and wanted me. Thus, fate seemed to forward my
plans. I had thought to go away for a while, I told mother all. How
her dear heart ached for me! Yet she dared not say aught against my
decision. She took charge of the note for the doctor, and by noon I
was on my journey. Two years passed ere I returned home. Mother wrote
me but little news of either Lilly or her doctor after the first
letter, telling that my note was a severe sho