; that because the buyer has a never-ceasing tongue, the
seller must rattle as fast as she; that because she tells a hundred lies
to run down his goods, he must tell another hundred to run them up; and
that because she belies the goods one way, he must do the same the other
way.

There is a happy medium in these things. The shopkeeper, far from being
rude to his customers on one hand, or sullen and silent on the other,
may speak handsomely and modestly, of his goods; what they deserve, and
no other; may with truth, and good manners too, set forth his goods as
they ought to be set forth; and neither be wanting to the commodity he
sells, nor run out into a ridiculous extravagance of words, which have
neither truth of fact nor honesty of design in them.

Nor is this middle way of management at all less likely to succeed, if
the customers have any share of sense in them, or the goods he shows any
merit to recommend them; and I must say, I believe this grave middle way
of discoursing to a customer, is generally more effectual, and more to
the purpose, and more to the reputation of the shopkeeper, than a storm
of words, and a mouthful of common, shop-language, which makes a noise,
but has little in it to plead, except to here and there a fool that can
no otherwise be prevailed with.

It would be a terrible satire upon the ladies, to say that they will not
be pleased or engaged either with good wares or good pennyworths, with
reasonable good language, or good manners, but they must have the
addition of long harangues, simple, fawning, and flattering language,
and a flux of false and foolish words, to set off the goods, and wheedle
them in to lay out their money; and that without these they are not to
be pleased.

But let the tradesman try the honest part, and stand by that, keeping a
stock of fashionable and valuable goods in his shop to show, and I dare
say he will run no venture, nor need he fear customers; if any thing
calls for the help of noise, and rattling words, it must be mean and
sorry, unfashionable, and ordinary goods, together with weak and silly
buyers; and let the buyers that chance to read this remember, that
whenever they find the shopkeeper begins his noise, and makes his fine
speeches, they ought to suppose he (the shopkeeper) has trash to bring
out, and believes he has fools to show it to.

CHAPTER XIX

OF FINE SHOPS, AND FINE SHOWS

It is a modern custom, and wholly unknown to our ancestors