s.

MAR. To him she yields her woman's love and truth.

BEN. (in a very confidential tone)
Bashful was I in youth,
Now somewhat am I altered.
Well, what I like myself ...
Must know that my one delight ...
Is a merry damsel,--and small,
I do not ask a whale, nor a world-map to study,
Nor, like a full moon,
A face round and ruddy;
But leanness, downright leanness, No! No!
Lean women's claws oftentimes are scratchy,
Their temper somewhat catchy,
Full of aches, too, and mourning,
As my wife is my warning.

(MARCEL bangs his fist down on the table and rises; the others follow
his example, BENOIT looking on in bewilderment.)

MAR. A wife possessing!
Yet thoughts impure confessing.

SCH. and COL. Foul shame!

RUD. His vile pollution empoisons our honest abode.

SCH. and COL. Hence!

MAR. With perfume we must fumigate!

COL. Drive him forth, the reprobate!

SCH. Morality offended hence expels you!

(BENOIT staggeringly rises, and tries in vain to speak.)

BEN. But say--I say!

MAR. Be silent!

COL. Be silent!

RUD. Be silent!

(They surround BENOIT and gradually push him to the door.)

BEN. Sirs, I beg you!

MAR., SCH. and COL. Be silent, out, your lordship! Hence away!

RUD., MAR., SCH. and COL. Wish we your lordship a pleasant Christmas
Eve. Ah!

(They push BENOIT outside the door.)

MAR. (locking the door) I have paid the last quarter!

SCH. In the Quartier Latin
Momus awaits!

MAR. Long live the spender!

SCH. We'll the booty divide!

RUD. We'll divide!

COL. We'll divide! (they divide the money on the table)

MAR. (holding out a cracked mirror to COLLINE)
Beauty is a gift heaven descended,
Now you are rich, to decency pay tribute.
Bear! have your mane attended!

COL. The first chance I can find,
I will make acquaintance with a beard eraser!
So guide me to the monstrous outrage of a barber's weapon.
Let's go!

SCH. We go!

MAR. and COL. We go!

RUD. I stay here, finish I must the article for my new journal,
"Beaver"!

MAR. Be quick then!

RUD. Five minutes only, I know well the work!

COL. We'll await you at the porter's lodge!

MAR. Delay, and you'll hear the chorus!

RUD. Five minutes only!

SCH. You must cut short the Beaver's growing tale!

(RUDOLPH _takes a light from the table and goes to open the door:
the others go out and descend the staircase_.)

MAR. (_from without_) Look to the staircase! keep well to the
handrail!

RUD. (_on the landing near t