They know how fleeting
passion and fancy are; and they rightly conceive that it is their
duty by all possible means to prevent their daughter making an
unworthy marriage. How far parents may lawfully interfere is a
question not yet decided, nor yet easy to decide. The American
idea of marriage is, theoretically, that every soul finds its
companion soul, and lives happily ever after; and in this romantic
search for a companion soul, young girls are allowed to roam about
society, just when their instincts are the strongest and their
reason the weakest. The French theory--to which the English is akin
somewhat--is that a mother's knowledge is better than a girl's fancy;
and that the wisdom that has hitherto chosen her teachers, physicians,
spiritual guides, and companions, that has guided her through
sickness and health, is not likely to fail in selecting the man most
suitable for her husband.

This latter theory supposes women to love naturally any personable man
who is their own, and who is kind to them; that is, if she has a
virgin heart, and comes in this state from her lessons to her marriage
duties. The American theory supposes girls to love by sympathy, and
through soul attraction and personal attraction; consequently, our
girls are let loose early--too early--to choose among a variety of
Wills and Franks and Charlies; and the natural result is a great
number of what are called "love matches" to which it must be
acknowledged _mesalliances_ are too often the corollary. Between these
two theories, it is impossible to make a positive selection; for the
bad of each is so bad, and the good of each so good that both alike
are capable of the most unqualified praise and blame. It may, however,
be safely asserted that the confidence every American girl has in her
own power to choose her own husband helps to lessen the danger and to
keep things right. For an honorable girl may be trusted with her own
honor; and a dishonorable one, amid a number to choose from, may
peradventure fare better than she deserves; for Fortune does sometimes
bring in the bark that is not steered.

Most girls make _mesalliances_ in sheer thoughtlessness, or through
self-will, or in that youthful passion for romance which thinks it
fine to lose their world for love. Foolish novels are as often to
blame for their social crime as foolish men,--novels which are an
apotheosis of love at any cost! Love against every domestic and social
obligation! Love i