s covered with stuff like that. She's
a sizable old girl anyway, but in that rig, and with her store hair
puffed out, she loomed up like a bale of hay in a door.

"Why, how do you do!" she squeals, makin' a swoop at Sadie as soon as
the wheels stopped turnin'. "And you did bring them along, didn't you?
Now don't say a word until I get Peter--he's just gone in to brush the
cigar ashes off his vest. We want to be presented to the Duke and
Duchess together, you know. Peter! Pe-ter!" she shouts, and in
through the front door she waddles, yellin' for the old man.

And say, just by the look Sadie gave me I knew what was runnin' through
her head.

"Shorty," says she, "I've a mind to do it."

"Flag it," says. "You ain't got time."

But there was no stoppin' her. "Listen," says she to the Tortonis.
"Can't you play Duke and Duchess of Kildee for an hour or so?"

"What are the lines?" says Skinny.

"You've got to improvise as you go along," says she. "Can you do it?"

"It's a pipe for me," says he. "Flossy, do you come in on it?"

Did she? Why, Flossy was diggin' up her English accent while he was
askin' the question, and by the time Mrs. Wigghorn got back, draggin'
Peter by the lapel of his dress coat, the Tortonis was fairly oozin'
aristocracy. It was "Chawmed, don'tcher know!" and "My word!" right
along from the drop of the hat.

I didn't follow 'em inside, and was just as glad I didn't have to.
Sittin' out there, expectin' to hear the lid blow off, made me nervous
enough. I wasn't afraid either of 'em would go shy on front; but when
I remembered Flossy's pencilled eyebrows, and Skinny's flannel collar,
I says to myself, "That'll queer 'em as soon as they get in a good
light and there's time for the details to soak in." And I didn't know
what kind of trouble the Wigghorns might stir up for Sadie, when they
found out how bad they'd been toasted.

It was half an hour before Sadie showed up again, and she was lookin'
merry.

"What have they done with 'em," says I--"dropped 'em down the well?"

Sadie snickered as she climbed in and told Jeems to whip up the team.
"Mr. and Mrs. Wigghorn," says she, "have persuaded the Duke and Duchess
to spend the week's end at Wigghorn Arms."

"Gee!" says I. "Can they run the bluff that long?"

"It's running itself," says Sadie. "The Wigghorns are so overcome with
the honour that they hardly know whether they're afoot or horseback;
and as for your friends, they're m