unity, to
do literary work. At Lake George, where he spent his summers with the
community, he was able to have a familiar contact with us all,
especially the students, whom he enlisted in working about the
grounds or the house, helping as best he could. But after his illness
began he ever showed a certain constraint of manner when the
conversation took a grave turn, a kind of shyness, which a judge of
character might interpret as meaning, "I am afraid you'll
misunderstand me; I am afraid you'll think I am a visionary."

________________________

CHAPTER XXXV

CONCLUSION

FATHER HECKER'S prayer during all these years was a state of what
seemed almost uninterrupted contemplation of varied intensity. He
attended the evening meditation of the community as long as he had
strength to do so, frequently giving a commentary on the points read
out at the beginning, simple, direct, and fervent. He was exceedingly
fond of assisting at High Mass on Sundays and feast days, and he had
a small oratory built between the house and the new church, from
which, by passing a few steps from his room, he could hear the music
and see the function through a window opening into the sanctuary.
This often overpowered him with emotion, which was sometimes so
strong as to drive him back to his room and into bed. Once a week and
on the more solemn festivals was as often as he could say Mass, or
even hear it, on account of his extreme weakness in the mornings. For
the last three or four years of his life to say Mass at all became a
struggle which was as curious as it was distressing to witness. Those
who had often read of such things in the lives of the servants of God
were nevertheless amazed at the sight of them in Father Hecker. The
following is from a memorandum:

_"Father Hecker:_ Do you know what it is to be in spontaneous
relations with God--where the Divine Object works upon the soul
spontaneously? It is that which prevents me from saying Mass, because
I make a fool of myself. At any point I am apt to be so influenced by
God as to be utterly deprived of physical force, to sink down
helpless. At my brother's house they expect it and get me a chair. A
few moments on a chair, and I am ready to go on. Now, if I yield to
this I know that I shall be thrown into a clean helpless state, and I
have a practical work to do. _Question:_ Does this effect come at
receiving Communion? _Answer:_ I don't know, as I have never yet
received Communio