f the way back to the Corrugated without sayin' a word.
Then, just as we gets into the elevator, he unloosens.

"I don't believe it will do any good to try," says he; "but I've a mind
to give it a whirl."

I didn't say so, but that was the first thing we'd agreed on that day.
So that night I has to send off a report which reads like this:

Mortimer's health O. K.; disposition ragged; business prospects punk.

Hoping you are the same,

TORCHY.

It's a wonder Mortimer didn't have mental indigestion, with all that
load of gilt-edged advice on his mind, and I wa'n't lookin' for him to
lug it much further'n the door; but, if you'll believe me, he seems to
take it serious. Every mornin' after that I finds his hat on the hook
when I come in, and whenever I gets a glimpse of him durin' the day he
has his coat off and is makin' a noise like the busy bee. At this it
takes some time before he makes an impression on Miller; but fin'lly
Morty comes out to me with a bulletin that seems to tickle him all over.

"What do you know?" says he. "When Miller was looking over some of my
work to-day he breaks out with, 'Very good, Upton. Keep it up.'"

"Well, I expect you told him to chase himself, eh?" says I.

"No," says Mortimer. "I sprung that new scheme of mine for filing the
back records, and perhaps he's going to adopt it."

"Think of that!" says I. "Say, you keep on, and you'll be presented
with that job for life. But, honest, you don't find Miller such a
fish, do you?"

"Oh, I guess he's all right in his way," says Mortimer.

"Then brace yourself, Morty," says I, "while I slip you some more
golden words. Tackle that boardin' house bunch of yours. Ah, hold
your breath while you're doin' it, if you want to, and spray yourself
afterwards with disinfectant, but see if you can't learn to mix in."

"But why?" says he. "I can't see the use."

"Say, for the love of Pete," says I, "ain't it hard enough for me to
press out all this wise dope without drawin' diagrams? I don't know
why, only you should. Go on now, take it from me."

Maybe it was followin' my hunch, or maybe there wa'n't anything else
for him to do, but blamed if this didn't work too. Inside of two weeks
he gives me the whole tale, one day as we're sittin' in the armchairs
at the dairy lunch.

"Remember my telling you about the fellow who wore the outing shirt?"
says he. "Well, say, he's quite a chap, you know. He's from some
little town out