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u think?" "I fancy it should prove adequate, sir." "I wonder. We must not spoil the ship for a ha'porth of tar. I think I'll add just another fluid ounce or so." "I would not advocate it, sir. In the case of Lord Brancaster's parrot----" "You are falling into your old error, Jeeves, of thinking that Gussie is a parrot. Fight against this. I shall add the oz." "Very good, sir." "And, by the way, Jeeves, Mr. Fink-Nottle is in the market for bright, clean stories to use in his speech. Do you know any?" "I know a story about two Irishmen, sir." "Pat and Mike?" "Yes, sir." "Who were walking along Broadway?" "Yes, sir." "Just what he wants. Any more?" "No, sir." "Well, every little helps. You had better go and tell it to him." "Very good, sir." He passed from the room, and I unscrewed the flask and tilted into the jug a generous modicum of its contents. And scarcely had I done so, when there came to my ears the sound of footsteps without. I had only just time to shove the jug behind the photograph of Uncle Tom on the mantelpiece before the door opened and in came Gussie, curveting like a circus horse. "What-ho, Bertie," he said. "What-ho, what-ho, what-ho, and again what-ho. What a beautiful world this is, Bertie. One of the nicest I ever met." I stared at him, speechless. We Woosters are as quick as lightning, and I saw at once that something had happened. I mean to say, I told you about him walking round in circles. I recorded what passed between us on the lawn. And if I portrayed the scene with anything like adequate skill, the picture you will have retained of this Fink-Nottle will have been that of a nervous wreck, sagging at the knees, green about the gills, and picking feverishly at the lapels of his coat in an ecstasy of craven fear. In a word, defeatist. Gussie, during that interview, had, in fine, exhibited all the earmarks of one licked to a custard. Vastly different was the Gussie who stood before me now. Self-confidence seemed to ooze from the fellow's every pore. His face was flushed, there was a jovial light in his eyes, the lips were parted in a swashbuckling smile. And when with a genial hand he sloshed me on the back before I could sidestep, it was as if I had been kicked by a mule. "Well, Bertie," he proceeded, as blithely as a linnet without a thing on his mind, "you will be glad to hear that you were right. Your theory has been tested and proved correct.
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