ver his countenance.

"Didn't you say something about a sacred concert?" he said. "Good
Heavens," cried Daphne, jumping up. "I forgot all about it. It begins
at thr--"

Arrested by her husband's seraphic smile, she swung round and looked at
the clock.

Berry apostrophized the carpet.

"Sweet are the uses of perversity," he said, with inimitable
inflection. For a moment his wife eyed him, speechless with
inindignation. Then:

"I hope you've got ear-ache," she said.

Berry settled himself among the cushions.

"I have," he said, "But back-ache would have been worse."

I sank back in my seat with an injured air. The coach swayed slightly,
as it rattled over the points. The train was gathering speed. In the
far corner of the compartment the brooch of a gay green hat winked at
me over the top of The Daily Glass.

"That's a nice thing," said I.

"What?" said the girl, laying down her paper.

"Oh, nothing. Only the train's run through the station I was going to
get out at. That's all."

"How tiresome for you!"

"There are consolations. You would never have opened your small red
mouth, but for my exclamation. And I should never have exclaimed, but
for--"

"It's very rude to make personal remarks." This severely.

"Only when the person's plain or the remark rude. Note the
alliteration."

"What are you going to do?

"Obey orders, I suppose." said I, pointing to the door.

"'Wait until the train stops?'"

"I think so," said I, looking at the flashing hedgerows.

"You see, I've given up acting for the pictures. Otherwise, I should
adjust my handcuffs, run along the foot-board, and dive in the
direction of the nearest pond."

"While I--?"

"Lay perfectly still. You see, I should be carrying you in my teeth."

"Thanks awfully."

"Not at all. It's a great life."

"It's a rotten death."

"Possibly. Otherwise, you emerge from the infirmary to find that A
Jump for Life has already left the Edgware Road for Reading and is
eagerly expected at Stockton-on-Tees, that the company for which you
work is paying twenty-seven percent and that rehearsals for Kicked to
Death begin on Monday. However."

I stopped. The girl was leaning back in her corner, laughing
helplessly.

"It's all very fine to laugh," said I. "How would you like to be
carried a county and a half beyond your station?"

"You should have asked before you got in."

"Asked?" said I. "The only person I didn't ask was th