ut--I had no money to go with and, as I said before, no place to
go to. And besides Emma Cavendish was overwhelmed with grief and could
not bear to be left alone; and she begged me to come down here with her.
So, driven by my own necessities and drawn by hers, I came down. Do you
blame me? _Do_ you blame me?" she coaxed, pathetically.
"No, I do not blame you for that. But," said the old man, gravely and
sadly, shaking his head, "why, when you got here, did you turn
eavesdropper and spy?"
"Oh, me!--oh, dear me!" sobbed the siren. "It was the sin of
helplessness and cowardice. I dreaded discovery so much! Every
circumstance alarmed me. Your arrival and your long mysterious
conversation with madam alarmed me. I thought exposure imminent. I
feared to lose this home, which, lonely, dreary, hopeless as it is to
me, is yet the only refuge I have left on earth. I am penniless and
helpless; and but for this kind family I should be homeless and
friendless. Think if I had been cast out upon the world what must have
been my fate!"
"What, indeed!" echoed the old man.
"Therefore, I dreaded to be cast out. I dreaded discovery. Your visit
filled me with uneasiness, that, as the day wore away, reached intense
anxiety, and finally arose to insupportable anguish and suspense. Then I
went to listen at the door, only to hear whether your conversation
concerned me--whether I was still to be left in peace or to be cast out
upon the bitter cold world. Ah, do not blame me too much! Just think how
I suffered!" she said, pathetically, clasping her hands.
"'Oh, what a tangled web we weave
When first we practice to deceive!'"
murmured the old man to himself. Then, aloud, he said:
"Poor girl, you were snared in the web of your own contriving! Yet
still, when I caught you in that net, why did you deny your identity and
try to make me believe that you were somebody else?"
"Oh, the same sin of helplessness and cowardice; the same fear of
discovery and exposure; the same horror of being cast forth from this
pure, safe, peaceful home into the bitter, cold, foul, perilous world
outside! I feared, if you found out who I was, you would expose me, and
I should be cast adrift. And then it all came so suddenly I had no time
for reflection. The instinct of self-preservation made me deny my
identity before I considered what a falsehood I uttered. Ah, have you no
pity for me, in considering the straits to which I was reduced?" she
pleade
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